Keep your enemies closer
by Morganofthefairies
Summary: She's been alone on this damn island for weeks, but a chance meeting with Sawyer changes everything.SawyerOC A little DesmondOC and who knows what else. Chapter 21 up finally! Sorry for the delay :
1. Chapter 1: I wake

**A/N: Ok, i know the title and summary are completely stupid, but i really suck at this kind of stuff. I was just going to call it "Alone" but that seems so...boring. Umm...please be kind, as this is my first an only fic at the moment and my self-confidence is messed up like most teenage girls. Anyway, on to (hopefully) better things:**

**Chapter One**

I wake.

All I can see is white. Blinding, searing white. My eyelids instantly shutter. I slowly open my eyes again and I squint to find that it is already daylight. I rub my eyes to get rid of the black spots in my vision. I look down at my arms and see little bites all over them. Sand flies. The little buggers really love the taste of me. Mumbling to myself about how I got into this mess, I dust the sand off me and stand up. I look left and right. Nothing but sand on both sides. Why does the sight of endless white sand still surprise me? I realize that I am talking to myself. "Talking to your self is the first sign of craziness", I say to nobody.

_But you don't have to worry until you start answering. Wait…does this count as an answer? _I shake the thought off.

I walk.

I walk towards the ocean, hoping that the salt water will rid me of the itch of those damn flies. The beach is really quite beautiful today, but when it is all you have seen for three weeks, and the only company you've had, the beauty wears off and the sense of being alone is all that's left. I've lost count of how many hours I would sit on the sand, watching, waiting for some form of vessel to appear and take me from this immense loneliness. Sometimes, in one of my cruel moments, I would hope that a boat full of people would end up stranded, making me solitary no longer. I would always feel guilty about it after though. It was all futile anyway; I was going to die on this island. Alone.

How would it end? Would I die of hunger gnawing at my stomach? Or perhaps I'll crack and drown myself in the ocean? Dehydration? Snake bite? Maybe I'll finish the pitiful excuse of a raft I've been trying to build (which at the moment was some bamboo logs and vines that looked more like an abstract piece of art than a raft) and get eaten by a shark? The more I walked the more ridiculous the 'what ifs' and 'maybes' became. I was up to my eleventh death scenario (it's funny how often I would count random things, just to pass the time) before I realized that I hadn't washed my bites yet. Strangely enough they didn't itch any more.

That is when I hear the noise. My head snaps in the direction of the tropical jungle to my right. I stare into the dark green void for a moment, deciding if I should just pretend I didn't hear it like I had done every other time, or if I should have a little investigation. The last and only time I braved the jungle was to collect the bamboo and vines for my _'raft'_. I look around whilst glancing back frequently at the jungle and find a large stick lying a few meters away and pick it up. I'm not going to go in there unprotected. _When had I decided I was going in there?_ With that question on my mind, I advance slowly up the rise of sand that leads to the jungle.

I enter the jungle, and the sudden lack of sun and light makes me shiver, or perhaps it is the fact that I am scared. As I advance, it gets darker and darker, until I can no longer see anything but outlines of trees and bushes. The noise is getting louder, I must be getting closer. I hide behind a huge tree trunk and ready myself for an attack. The sound of crunching leaves is close, so close, and I choose now to attack.

I put all my might behind the swing, and I feel the log hit solidly with…something.

With all the adrenaline pumping through my body, I don't even have the logic to look at what it was I had hit.

I run.

All I can see is green. Dizzying blurs of green. It seemed like I'd been running for a long time, but then I realized that I was only meters away from where I had started. I hear a muffled groan from behind me and almost stop dead in my tracks. The knowledge that whatever I had hit was now conscious was so shocking that I become paralyzed with fear. My brain was screaming for my legs to move, but it was as if any connection between my body and my mind had been severed. I hear another groan and a rustle of leaves behind me and finally I will my body to move.

I hide.

I find a big leafy shrub of some kind and hide behind it. My heart is pounding so loud that I am sure whatever is after me can hear it. All I can see is green. My back is pressed so hard against a tree trunk that it feels as if the bark is molding into my skin. I don't feel the pain though, I am far to scared to feel pain at the moment. I can hear the thing advancing towards me slowly. My mind is racing with terrible visions of monsters and beasts with sharp fangs and red eyes All of a sudden the sound stops. I am too scared to look up, afraid that this thing might be the last thing I ever see. I can smell the wetness of the jungle; feel the moist soil at my feet, the bark in my back, the terror in my heart. I wait for what feels like an eternity, yet the blink of an eye, until I can no longer take it. I scramble forward on my hands and feet and then bolt in whatever direction my feet will take me.

I fall.

Pain explodes from my right cheekbone as I hit the ground hard. I spit out bitter soil from my mouth and try to wipe the dirt out of my eyes, all while trying to get up. My right arm gives way and I fall again on my face. I try to bite back a sob as I hit the ground again, but it escapes my lips the same time as the stinging tears fill my eyes. I hear the crunch of leaves and soil very close and see a giant foot in front of my face. I hit it with all the force I can gather with my left arm and I am rewarded with a yell and an expletive. Now I know my pursuer is an English-speaking male. I try to roll onto my back so I can kick him where it's going to hurt the most, but as I try I get a foot pressed in between my shoulder blades. My face is once again reunited with the dirt. There is silence for a moment, and I am glad to hear that I am not the only one who is breathing rather erratically, glad to know that I had put up some semblance of a fight.

I laugh.

For some reason, an uncontrollable urge to laugh had overcome all my sense of fear, of pain, of anything. "Well I'm glad you're gettin' a laugh outta all this." An irritated American voice says behind me.

So, I'm getting chased and beaten by a Yankee guy around a jungle…does it get any better than this?

"So, I'm getting chased and beaten by a Yankee guy around a jungle… does it get any better than this?" I surprise myself at my lack of originality. But then, I am face down in the mud with a rather large sized boot on my back, so I cut myself some slack.

I hear the man snicker. I feel two large hands grab my upper arms and turn me over so I am now lying on my back. The man pins me to the ground, his knees on either sides of my legs and his arms holding mine down. I am unable to move. The fangs I had conjured in my mind are really just an arrogant smirk and the eyes are not an evil glowing red, but green. Our faces are very close, and I can see sweat and blood on his. The blood must be from where I hit him. I smile smugly up at him, or at least try to, until I realize I have a split lip. I stare defiantly into his eyes and refuse to let it show that the tips of his dirty blonde hair are tickling my face. I also refuse to talk.

My eyes dart to my left and I see white sand, the very thing that I thought I would be glad to never see again, so I know I'm on the outskirts of the jungle.

They dart back to his face, which still has that damn smirk on it. A lone drop of sweat runs down the bridge of his nose, it hangs on the tip, and stays there for an excruciatingly long time. It falls from his nose in what seems to be a painfully slow speed and lands on my forehead. I grimace and yell indignantly.

He laughs. I snap.

I head butt him in the face and he lets go of my arms from the force of the blow. I scramble away from him and try to make a run for it, well, a crawl for it, and almost manage to until a hand grabs my foot and pulls me back. Twigs scratch me as I am dragged on my stomach towards him. "Let me go!" I yell as I kick frantically with my free leg. "What the hell are you? Some kinda feral monkey girl!" he yells almost comically.

"I swear if you don't let me go-"I'm cut off before I could finish my threat, which no doubt would've been something as immature and juvenile as "I'll kill you" or "you'll be sorry". Perhaps it's a good thing I can't finish it off.

A lot of weight rests on the small of my back, and I feel as though my lungs are going to burst. He is…sitting on me!

"I'm not a couch!" I rasp and gulp for air.

"Well my head aint a damn baseball neither!" he growls, "But you thought it'd be fun to give it a good ol' whack!" his voice grows increasingly louder as he finishes his statement. I try to give a sharp retort but I can barely breathe, never mind argue. He leans forward to try and hear what I was saying, and his weight shifts. I think my ribs are going to crack. His face lowers so that I can see it, an innocent look plastered on it. Don't pretend that you don't know I can't breathe, you pompous bastard.

I spit on his face.

I almost laugh at the transformation. His face, only seconds ago having an insufferable faux innocence, now had a look of utmost shock. I use this diversion as a chance to get away from him. I roll over onto my back, throwing him off me.

I escape.

I recover quicker than him and run towards where I saw the sand. I can hear him running after me, most likely at a faster pace, considering I am clumsy at the best of times. I am mere meters away from the sand and that sight gives me more speed and numbs the pain that had shot through my body as I started to escape.

Escape. Escape from _what_? Escape to _where_? Do I just keep running up and down the beach until either I collapse of exhaustion or he does? Still, I keep running. I feel a hand grabbing blindly for something to latch onto, and I try with desperation to speed up. The sand feels like cement and it feels as though gravity is forcing me slowly down, but I keep running.

I spare a look behind me and have only enough time to gasp in alarm as my pursuer dives and tackles me to the ground. I squirm and turn onto my back and kick him, hard, in the chest. The man's face crumples in agony and he falls face down in the sand. I feel something sticky on my foot, I must be bleeding.

I crawl over to the man and give him the same treatment he gave me, I sit on him. He groans and squirms in pain. _Good. Serves him right, whoever he is, for hurting me._ I swallow and gulp for air for a moment and finally speak. "Who…are you?" I question breathlessly.

The man has stopped squirming.

_Oh god, he's not…_I scramble off him and turn him onto his back. I notice a hole in his shirt and a large red patch below his right shoulder. _He's been shot._ My eyes widen in shock. It's _his _blood on my foot.

**Well...that was it. I'm reallyworried aboutthisbeing total crap, so reviews would be greatly appreciated.I already have the second chapter done, but i'm not sure if i should post it or not. please, please, PLEASE review:)**

**Morganofthefairies**


	2. Chapter 2: I falter

**A/N: Well...i thought i might as well give this fic something that resembles an ending...although i love Sawyer and i think i could write him forever. Again, be kind please. Constructive criticism is very much welcome. I really hope the girl is not a mary-sue, as i rather despise them.**

**Chapter Two**

I falter.

I sit there gaping as the semi-healed wound starts to bleed. The patch of blood on his shirt gets bigger, and for some reason I don't want this man to die, even though it seemed as though death is what he wished upon me. A shaking hand checks for a pulse, and I wish I learnt proper CPR. My hands skate down his chest to the bottom of his shirt and I rip a strip off the bottom with my teeth. I roll it into a ball and press down firmly over the wound. _I have no idea what I am doing, and this man is going to die because of it._ The ball of shirt is now a deep red. There is blood, so much blood, all over my hands.

I shakily stand up. "Stay there", I tell the half dead man. I mentally slap myself for the stupid remark and run towards my camp site. I run down the beach as fast as I can and look frantically for my backpack, the one with medical supplies. I do a double take as I find it, fling it over my shoulder and bolt back to the man. I empty the contents of the bag onto the beach, and find a bandage. _What do I do now?_ I grab the tiny pair of scissors from my toiletry Bag and cut up one side of the mans shirt. Half his chest is tinged red. I look anxiously for something to cover the wound with, and as a last resort, I find a pad, tear it from its wrapper and cover the wound with it. I can imagine the look on his face when I tell him he survived because of a pad!_ If_ he survives.

I move behind him and gingerly lift his back so I can wrap the bandage around him. I hear a groan and I crane my neck around to look at his face. His eyes are still closed. I start to wrap the bandage around him and wonder to myself how in a matter of minutes I had gone from trying to cause this man as much physical pain as possible, to trying to save his life. Ironic, really.

I fix the bandage with a clip and mentally thank my mother for insisting I bring medical supplies on a trip to L.A of all places. I roll up his shirt and place it behind his head. I have to find something for him to wear. The sun is out, and it is a pleasant temperature outside, but to me it is stifling.

I walk quickly back to my camp and rummage through the pile of men's clothes I had found in suitcases, that had washed up on shore, along with the tail end of the plane I was on. I find a red t-shirt (at least the blood won't be so obvious) and jog back to the limp form of the man.

A frown creases his forehead, which has a light sheen of sweat on it, and he is mumbling something. I open a bottle of fresh water, my last, and soak a cloth in it. I stoically wipe the blood of his face, then off his chest and stomach. I move to push the hair away from his eyes and catch myself mid-action, the intimacy of the situation making me stop. After all, he _did_ try and_ kill_ me earlier. _I don't even know his name, or anything else about him_, I reason. I take a swig of water and think about what to do next.

I cry.

The familiar stinging behind my eyes appeared, and before I can stop them, hot, angry tears spill down my face. I cry for myself, for getting stuck on this stupid spit of land. I cry for my family who think their daughter, sister, aunt and grandchild is dead. I cry for the other people on the plane, who could possibly be in the same situation as me, and I cry for this man, who was unlucky enough to be stuck with such a useless bint. I cry myself to sleep.

When I wake, the sun is low and the sky is tinted orange and pink. I wipe sand of the right side of my face and stretch languidly. I look over at the man and am startled to see that he is looking back at me, confusion plastered on his face.

Heat rushes to my cheeks and I wipe my face with my hands to will it away and also to rid myself of the remaining sand. I look down at the white sand and start running my fingers through it, trying to avoid his eyes.

I try to suppress another yawn. "How…how long have you been awake?" I risk a glance at him.

He just gives a grin and ignores my question. "If you wanted to get my clothes off," he stops for a moment to cough, "there are easier ways to do it than tryna kill me." He says with that bloody smirk back on his face. I roll my eyes and cross my arms. "Who are you?" I ask, my voice harsher than I had intended.

"Who am I? Who the hell are you? And why the hell did you find it necessary to beat the crap outta me 'til I passed out!" he yells.

I try to think of some quick retort, buti am too angry for that.I tell him my name. "But feel free to continue to call me feral monkey girl; it has a nice ring to it." I say sarcastically, then ad "I thought you were some bloody monster trying to kill me! What was I supposed to do!" I yell defensively.

"Well what about when you knew that I wasn't a _monster_, why'd ya insist on frolicking then, monkey girl?" he questions, and he is starting to sit up. Perhaps his situation wasn't as bad as I thought it had been.

"I wasn't 'frolicking', you would _know_ if i was frolicking...and I kept hitting you because you wouldn't let me go! You were a strange man attacking me, and as far as I knew, a psychopath." I top my statement off with a glare.

"Ha! Me, the psychopath? Now that's hilarious!"

I can't believe I wasted the last of my water on him.

"I can't believe I wasted the last of my water on you", I say more harshly than I intended.

For a moment I think I actually saw hurt flicker across his face. "You know, I never asked you to 'save me'. In fact, I wouldn't need 'saving' if you didn't clobber me one!" He moves to get up, and I see him grimace in pain. I stop him with a hand. He smiled condescendingly at me. "If you expect a thank you, you'll be waitin' for a while. It aint my thing darlin'."

He pushes past my hand and walks off stiffly. I follow suit. "You're insufferable, you know that? I saved you from a near fatal experience and you can't even thank me! You're not some _god_ you know. You are a human being, and you can get hurt, contrary to you're beliefs", my voice rising to a yell as I stomp after him.

He rounds on me and growls dangerously, "I would be more worried about whether or not you get hurt, if I were you." He starts stalking towards me with a malicious glint in his eyes, and i stumble backwards, keeping as far away from him as possible. I am now past my knees in water, but he keeps following me. In one impossibly quick movement for somebody who was so badly injured, he lunges forward and pushes me backwards into the water. I shriek as I splash ungracefully into the water. I surface and gasp for air, with what i imagine is a look not unsimilar to the face he pulled when i spat on him.

"The names Sawyer, by the way," He yells as he walks back to shore. I try not to run and attack him, which at the time seemed like a very good idea. Instead I walk slowly out of the water, pulling my hair out of my face, grab the red t-shirt and wipe the water off me. I then throw it at _Sawyer's_ face. "Put some clothes on, would you Kotex. I suppose you're staying for a while, and the sand flies here are terribly hungry." I smirk.

"Kotex? What's that supposed to mean?" he asked, confusion clear on his face.

"You'll see." I say pointedly looking at his bandage.

_I think I've made a friend._

I walk back to camp with the sound of the waves crashing on the sand and the indignant shouts of Sawyer trailing behind me.

I groan.

Perhaps being alone wasn't as bad as I had thought.

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**Well...should i continue or just put you out of your misery and finish it there? Please review, it makes me smile :) I have more playful (or perhaps not-so-playful) banter between them that could make another chapter, or perhaps i could just kill them off and then the story HAS to end? **

**ummm...it could be a while before the next chapter as i got an idea of adding some flashback stuff to this, only the girls flashbacks though, i dont like messing TOO much with the original characters on this show, they are all so great! The rating would most likely go up, it's some serious stuff i am writing. I'll just have to even it out with more snappy one liners:)**

**Morganofthefairies**

**P.S Thankyou so much Alateriel567! Even having one review, and so quickly (about an hour after posting it) makes me so happy! Yes it was Sawyer, here have a cookie. :) **


	3. Chapter 3: I sigh

**A/N: Firstly, i have three reviews at the moment and 75 hits. What's goin on there! That's terrible! Shame on those people who don't review, reviews are my life source. PLEASE review, even if you want to say that my story is crap, as long as you give some constructive criticism also.**

**On a lighter note: Thankyou to my two reviewers Alateriel567 and Brenenna! Here, have some more cookies!**

**Umm...the rating is going up because...well there are hints at things that are not good for kiddies.**

**Chapter Three**

I sigh.

I poke absent mindedly at the fire, which Sawyer gave no help in making, even though it was quite obvious that I am rather useless at it. I look over at him. He is reclining on a make-shift bed made out of clothes and tarps, the very tarps that were part of my little tent. I remind him again of this, and again he says that I don't need to worry, it's not going to rain for a while. I tell him again that he is not a weatherman and that I'm not worried, just annoyed and now tarp-less. I muse on this fact for a moment, and realize that I am glowering at him, and fix my face into a somewhat pleasant facial expression.

"Well, now that you have my tarp, would it be possible for me to know who you really are, and where the hell you came from?" I ask with a tight smile that is so obviously laced with anger I could almost laugh.

"I told you, my name's Sawyer, and at the moment I don't feel much like an interrogation. I did almost die, remember? You should, you're the damn reason for it."

"I _said_ sorry!"

"Well, maybe _sorry_ doesn't cut it!"

"I also gave you my tarps to make your stupid bed _and_ I gave you the last of the fresh water I had!" I count these off on my fingers.

"Oh so you think that in exchange for nearly killin' me, a drop of water and some tarp is gonna fix it? Uh-uh darlin', not even for a second."

"Well, what do I have to do for you to just tell me where the hell you came from?" I ask tiredly.

Sawyer grins in what some people would call a playful way, but it makes me want to tear his eyes right from their sockets. "Well...since you're offerin'..." he raises his eyebrows suggestively and it is such a cliché that I almost pity the poor guy for his lack of originality.

I snicker and roll my eyes at him. "My _god_, you really are full of yourself, aren't you?"

His grin widens, and it looks as if his face will crack if it gets any bigger, at least, I _hope_ it will. "Well, you know, you could be full of me too if-" The small amount of restraint I was holding vanishes as I hear his crass comment. I throw the stick that I had been poking the fire with right at his face, and it hits home just above his left eye. I am up in an instant, and storm off whilst Sawyer is still currently holding his face; repeating the same four letter curse over and over again.

"What the _hell_ is wrong with you! You're insane, you know that right?" I ignore the questions and keep walking down the beach, although I don't really have anywhere to go.

"Hey! I asked you a question!" His voice rises considerably and I can tell he is closer, but I don't dare turn around. _Not because I'm scared, because he doesn't deserve my attention...well, perhaps a little scared._

A rough hand grabs my upper arm harshly, and i turn to face him, my eyes flashing in an unspoken challenge. I notice that there is quite a big gash on his forehead and blood is slowly making its way down his cheekbone. "Well?" he growls, and I'm not sure if it sounds more like a threat or a question. "Well what?" "You_ know_ what." His grip on my arm tightens and it is starting to hurt, but I refuse to let him know.

"What's wrong with me? What the hell is wrong with _me_! You are! This is the scariest time of my life! I had to watch my friend _die_ on this island! I had to survive on my own forsix weeks! I had to be brave and not just give up hope! Then you show up and you won't even help or answer a few simple questions! THAT is what's wrong with me!" tears are running down my face and my face is flushed from anger and embarrassment. It's only now that I notice that he has let go of my arm. I turn away from him and try to calm myself down, ashamed that i had let him see my emotional outburst. After a moment I spare a glance at him and let out a shuddering breath.

His eyes are wide with shock and he replies softly " I...I didn't mean to get you so upset. I was just playin."

"Please... don't say that...it reminds me of someone I don't want to remember." It was too late. I could hear his voice in the back of my mind, and I shut my eyes tightly, willing it to go away.

_"Hello Morgan, would you like me to tuck you in?"_

_"No thanks, I...I'm alright."_

_"Don't be silly Morgan, you need to be tucked in, and i haven't done it for a long time, have I?"_

_"Please...don't."_

_"Shhh..."_

"Okay, I won't." I am snapped out of my memory and crash into the present. Sawyer is looking at me wearily, as if I am about to burst into tears again.

"Thank you." I give a small smile. He nods once and then there is silence for a moment.

After much deliberation I stick my hand out. "Let's at least_ try_ and be civil towards each other." He looks at it for a moment, deciding whether or not he should, and then shakes it. "Deal."

"C'mon, you need that war wound looked at." I look up at the gash i made on his head.

"Oh, you mean the one I got when you threw a stick at me," he smiles "can I really trust _you_ with my injuries?"

"I made a deal to be civil, didn't I?"

"Well, yes, but you didn't promise to be_ gentle_."

I laugh.

"That's because I only make promises I intend to keep."

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**Oh God! Now that i've started this story, i don't think i can stop! It will probably be a while until i update next, as i am finishing my last month of highschool in four days, then exams!aaaggghh! REVIEW PLEEEAAASE! i LIVE for reviews. C'mon, it's really easy! **

**Morganofthefairies**


	4. Chapter 4: I grimace

**A/N: Chapter Four is up! Tegan really is a friend of mine, although she doesn't smoke, i just really lack originality so i use names of people i know. **

**Ummm...next chapter really will be a while as i have decided to quit school so chaos will ensue with my parents, arguments, guilt trips, i'll have to find a job (hopefully at a book shop!). I dont even want to think about it.**

**Alateriel567:Thanks so much for reviewing every chapter. I hope i updated soon enough for you.**

**Good Kitty: Hey, i probably won't see you much any more now that i have quit school, but i will have to make it 'official' and all, so i'll see ya then. By the way, i dont appreciate your sarcasm! lol, actually i do.**

**baudelaire7: You like where the plot is going? Good, because i have no idea where it is going!Thanks for reviewing!**

**theLOSTCSIfreak, Laminator and Blackcat69: Thanks for reviewing. Sawyer is my favourite character too, if that wasn't obvious. He's grumpy, sexy, sarcastic...gush. **

* * *

**Chapter Four**

I grimace.

"It's that bad, huh?" Sawyer frowns and then winces from the sudden movement. I inspect the gash closely and continue cleaning it.

"No, it's not too bad; I'm just not that great around blood."

"Well...you coulda saved me a lot of pain, and yourself a lot of time, if you've just not hit me."

"Or, you could've not opened you mouth" I retort back.

Sawyer rolls his eyes and mumbles something under his breath that I don't quite hear, although I'm sure that I hear the words "time of" and "month". A few strands of hair block my view, so I blow them away from my face.

"How does you're breath still smell good?" he asks suspiciously.

"What? Oh...I brush my teeth; well I did until I gave you the last of my water." I point out.

Sawyer shakes his head and laughs, and I slap him on the shoulder for moving his head. "So, you brush your teeth every morning?"

I give a puzzled look. "Yes...and I use my mouthwash. But I'm almost out-"

"Mouthwash! Mouth...god damn you are somethin' else!" he pulls back and looks at me in amazement, as if I have done something incredible, and I give him a questioning look in return.

"Why? Because I try to keep everything as normal as I can here?"

His smile fades. "Is that what you're doing?"

"Yes...I think if I didn't, I'd go insane." My arm is still suspended mid-air, cloth in hand.

"Are you sure you aint already?"

"Well if I am, then it takes one to know one, as the saying goes."

"Ahh...but see, I don't know you, I barely know anything about you. Well, except that you brush your teeth and use mouthwash every day, and... you're not a bad throw." he smirks at me, and I notice that he has a dimple in his cheek which is quite cute. I move to finish cleaning his cut on his head. "There really isn't more to know...I'm quite boring."

"Well, I'm gonna have to argue that point."

I look at him to see if he is joking or not, and i can't really tell. "Well...you already know my name...I'm from Victoria, in Australia, and I'm...in my early twenties. Well...twenty to be exact."

He laughs. "You're still a teenager."

I glare.

"I'll have you know, I haven't been a teenager for eleven months, thank you very much. I am a responsible and mature adult."

"Well, over in the states, there are still drinks that you aint even allowed to drink yet."

"Well, in my country, people with half their brains missing are deported. So now I know why you left."

His face suddenly grows serious. "I wish."

There is an awkward silence. "So...what about you? Your real name isn't Sawyer is it?"

"Well is your real name Morgan? Anyway, isn't that a guy's name?"

"It is my real name, why the hell would I lie? And the last time I checked, I didn't have a penis, so I suppose it is a unisex name."

"Well...Sawyer is my last name. My first name is...stupid, so I'm not tellin' you."

For a moment I actually believed he would tell me, and then I mentally slap myself for being so stupid." Fine." I start to get up. I turn around a walk towards my 'bed'.

"Thirty...I'm thirty." I stop and turn back in the direction I had just come. I know he is only telling me these things either because they are lies, or because he needs me to fix him up, but I haven't had a conversation with another person for six weeks.

"Well, you better be careful, old man, if you break a hip you might not survive it." I smirk, and I realize that I am starting to do that often lately.

"My name...well...you promise not to laugh?" Sawyer looks so concerned it is comical, and I bite my lip to keep from laughing.

"Promise." I start thinking of the funniest names I can. Ruddiger? No. Lionel? Most likely not. Perhaps it is a real redneck name, like Billy-ray?

"It's...James. Alright, now you know, don't you dare laugh either" he threatens me.

I can't help it, the laugh is out before I can stop it. "My god! I can't believe it. You made a fuss over James? James! I was readying myself for something a lot more...unusual."

"God damn, I ask you to do one thing..."

"Sorry," I apologize, and grab his face to put a bandage on it. "So, where in the U.S are you from?"

"I...don't really have a 'home' as such, you see, I move around a lot for work."

"Oh yeah, what's that?" I ask, trying to imagine the man in front of me ever doing an honest days work in his entire life.

"I'm a businessman." he replies vaguely. I'm not happy with the answer, but i don't want to push my luck, so I keep my mouth shut.

"But I suppose home is in Tennessee, that's where I grew up." His eyes now have a glazed look, and I'm not sure that he's entirely here with me. I suppose this is as good a time as any to tell him about the 'special bandage' on his shoulder. It has already been left on too long anyway.

"Okay, now that we've fixed that up, I should change the one on your shoulder, James."

His head snaps towards me. "Don't call me that", he growls.

"What? Your name?" My god, for a thirty year old, he is bloody immature. But then, he is a male.

"Yes." he states bluntly.

"Alright. Well get your shirt off, _Sawyer_."

He slowly pulls it off, and I'm already holding back a smile as I imagine his reaction. I slowly roll off the bandage, and I notice by the smell of his breath that he certainly hasn't been brushing his teeth. This whole situation is a lot more uncomfortable now that he is fully conscious.

I am slightly surprised that he hasn't said some stupid sexist comment; perhaps my little outburst has made him hold his tongue. I peel the pad off his chest, and finally he looks down. His face transforms from neutral, into confusion, and then finally, into mortification.

I squeeze my eyes shut and, once nothing has happened for a moment, I slowly open one eye, and then the other. Sawyer is glaring right at me, his eyes fierce and his brows drawn together.

"What...the hell...is that...doing on me?"

I pull it off quickly. "It...It's not on you anymore, so it doesn't matter." He doesn't reply, so I continue "Alright, I panicked, the blood just kept coming. I had to use something. It's all I had on me. But don't worry; I have a proper Band-Aid thingy now." I hold up what looks to me like an oversized band-aid.

"You put a...a-"

"Pad." I supply helpfully.

"Yes, a _pad_ on my bullet wound!" he yells.

"Yes I did, and get over it. You should be thanking me, not screaming in my face!"

He looks as though he is going to yell again, but suddenly comprehension dawns on his face. "So, that's why you were calling me tampax, huh?"

I nod.

Sawyer starts laughing, and I am relieved that this isn't going to end up with me injuring him more. I start to laugh too. I start wiping off the dried blood from his chest, and once clean, I stick the Elastoplasts over the bullet wound. Sawyer sucks in his breath quickly and winces.

"Oh stop moaning. It can't be that bad", I chastise as I wrap the bandage around him.

Sawyer turns sharply towards me. "Say that again", he orders.

"Umm...stop moaning?" I say uncertainly.

His eyes widen, and he pulls back to get a better look at me. "You", he says slowly.

My brow furrows as I try to understand what the hell he is talking about.

"You...it is you." he says again, and now he's smiling and I swear I've seen that smile before. No, not a smile, a smirk.

_I look at my watch; I have ten minutes before the final boarding call._

_I chew my lip, it's a nervous habit of mine that I can't stop, even when I know I'm doing it. Why couldn't Tegan get her own damn cigarettes? Oh yeah, because she was in the toilet. _

_I take a deep breath. I am finally getting away from it all, from _him.

_My line moves forward a little, finally. I notice a tall guy in a grey-blue t-shirt ahead a little in the line next to mine. He's making a big deal of waiting, like he is the only damn person who has somewhere else to be. He keeps sighing and huffing impatiently. I roll my eyes._

_"Stop moaning, would you?" The man turns around, looking for who said it, and his eyes rest on me. I can't help but notice that he is quite good looking._

_"Excuse me?" he asks with an eyebrow raised._

_I stand a little taller. God, I am such an idiot! "I said, stop moaning, it can't be that bad. We're all in the same boat here, but huffing and puffing like a child isn't going to make the line move any faster."_

_I move up to the counter, happy that I no longer have to make a spectacle of myself. Then I notice that the same man is now next to me again. He pulls out a smoke, jams it between his lips, and is about to light when the woman serving me clears her throat and indicates to a sign that reads "No Smoking"._

_He mutters under his breath and shoves the smoke back in its packet._

_"You shouldn't smoke anyway, it's a disgusting habit." My god, I really can't help myself, can I?_

_"Oh really?" he asks, irritation clear in his voice._

_"Yes." I turn my attention towards the lady at the counter. "I'll have a packet of extra and...a pack of Marlboro's, please." The irony of the situation is not lost on me. _

_I hear him snicker and look up; he smirks and raises a questioning eyebrow towards the cigarettes. I pay the woman at the counter, grab the extra and chuck it in my bag. I pick up the smokes. "For a friend", I state, and throw them in also. I walk off._

_"Are all Aussie women like you?" he yells, for the whole bloody city to hear._

_I turn around. This is one of those moments you either say something completely lame and make a total ass of yourself, or you say something great and make a great exit with your theme song blaring._

_"Only the good ones." I smile, and walk off towards the gate. My theme song not blaring, but playing softly atleast._

I gasp.

"Oh my god...you..your-"

"From the airport."

"The one who wouldn't stop-"

"Moaning."

For a long moment there is silence. And then at the same time we blurt "You look different."

"You have a beard now, and you're hair...I didn't recognize you." _Well obviously, you idiot._

"You've...lost weight." he says uneasily, as if I'm going to slap him for the observation.

"Six weeks with 5 bags of peanuts will do that to you, I suppose." I look down, and my clothes are hanging off me. "Besides, you gave me quite a work out today."

"You've been livin' off of 5 bags of peanuts this whole time?" he asks skeptically.

I laugh. "No, I did manage to catch 3 fish, and some weird mango things, but I'm not sure I should be eating them."

He nods. "So...this friend of yours that died...she really was the one the smokes were for?"

I bite my lip and nod.

_"Took you long enough." I jump at the sudden sound._

_I turn to find Tegan standing there, all blonde hair and bronze skin. The exact opposite of me."Oh, it's you."_

_She gives a puzzled look. "Who else would it be?"_

_"Oh nobody, i just made a friend while i was getting your smokes."_

_"Oh really? A girl friend, or...a guy friend?"_

_"A guy. One of those guys who are good looking and they know it. A real tool, all smirks, you know."_

_"Aww...poor Morgan, bumping into attractive guys", she says sarcastically._

_"Oh shut up." I search through my bag and find the smokes. "Here ya go."_

_"Thanks." _

_"No, thank you for coming with me... I don't think I would've had the guts to go alone." I admit quietly._

_"Don't worry about it." Tegan leans forward and we give each other a tight hug._

_We walk through our gate, and towards the plane. It's happening, I'm finally getting away._

I come crashing out of that memory when a loud crash and a strange cry comes from the jungle.

My head snaps in the direction of the noise.

"What the hell..."I look towards Sawyer, he doesn't look scared, he looks as though he is trying to think, his brow furrowed.

"I'm back here", he states.

I stare.

I suppose I wasn't hearing things after all.

* * *

**A/N: Phew! That was a long one! Please Reiview! Push the button, go on, push it. I don't care what Walt says backwards, buttons are never bad.**


	5. Chapter 5: I gape

**Disclaimer: **WOW! i just realized that i have never done one of these things...Sawyer is not mine, but Morgan is mine because that is my name so there! If anyone has a Sawyer that they would like to get rid of, i will buy him. Seriously. 

**phoenix inferno: **you want to read it again and again? You think i'm funny? OMG I LOVE YOU!lol thanks :)

**Alateriel567**: lol you are almost as crazy as me! i am in a crazy mood coz tomorrow is my last day of school EVER! hmmm...libraries, aren't they great?So long, and thanks for all the fish! to you too, whatever that means lol. :)

**Blackcat69:**I am glad that you enjoy reading this story, coz i enjoy writing it. !blushes! thanks for saying i have a wonderful talent, it makes me feel loved. :) And i will have a great day! You have one too. :D

**THE sILENT sHE-wOLF:** Hey Kate!Whoops i just did the capitals in all the wrong places, and because i am lazy i shall leave it. Yes i am back at school, as you'd know coz i see you there! I love the way Sawyer talks too...drool trust me, you think MY character has an attitude problem...wait til season two when they introduce a new chick, man she is a biatch! Thanks for reviewing!

**Previously on Lost:**

"So, I'm getting chased and beaten by a Yankee guy around a jungle… does it get any better than this?"

* * *

I crawl over to the man and give him the same treatment he gave me, I sit on him. He groans and squirms in pain. _Good. Serves him right, whoever he is, for hurting me._ I swallow and gulp for air for a moment and finally speak. "Who…are you?" I question breathlessly.

The man has stopped squirming.

_Oh god, he's not…_ I notice a hole in his shirt and a large red patch below his right shoulder. _He's been shot._ My eyes widen in shock. It's _his _blood on my foot.

* * *

"Who am I? Who the hell are you? And why the hell did you find it necessary to beat the crap outta me 'til I passed out!" he yells.

* * *

He rounds on me and growls dangerously "I would be more worried about whether or not you get hurt, if I were you."

* * *

"The names Sawyer, by the way." He yells as he walks back to shore. "Put some clothes on, would you Kotex. I suppose you're staying for a while, and the sand flies here are terribly hungry." I smirk.

"Kotex? What's that supposed to mean?" he asked, confusion clear on his face.

* * *

"Let's at least_ try_ and be civil towards each other." He looks at it for a moment, deciding whether or not he should, and then shakes it. "Deal."

"C'mon, you need that war wound looked at." I look up at the gashI made on his head.

"Oh, you mean the one I got when you threw a stick at me," he smiles "can I really trust _you_ with my injuries?"

"I made a deal to be civil, didn't I?"

"Well, yes, but you didn't promise to be_ gentle_."

* * *

"You put a...a-"

"Pad." I supply helpfully.

"Yes, a _pad_ on my bullet wound!" he yells.

* * *

"Oh stop moaning. It can't be that bad", I chastise as I wrap the bandage around him.

Sawyer turns sharply towards me. "Say that again", he orders.

"Umm...stop moaning?" I say uncertainly.

His eyes widen, and he pulls back to get a better look at me. "You", he says slowly.

My brow furrows as I try to understand what the hell he is talking about.

"You...it is you." he says again, and now he's smiling and I swear I've seen that smile before. No, not a smile, a smirk.

I gasp.

"Oh my god...you..your-"

"From the airport."

"The one who wouldn't stop-"

"Moaning."

* * *

I come crashing out of that memory when a loud crash and a strange cry comes from the jungle.

My head snaps in the direction of the noise.

"What the hell..."I look towards Sawyer, he doesn't look scared, he looks as though he is trying to think, his brow furrowed.

"I'm back here", he states.

I stare.

I suppose I wasn't hearing things after all.

**Authors Note: **LOL I've always wanted to do that. And yes i know some bits don't really make sense, buy hey, this is a short chapter ok!

Oh yeah and someone new is gonna be introduced...well not 'new' as is i make them up, but 'new' as in hasn't been in my story yet, but is on the show. I would like to know who you guys think it should be, so tell me please:)

**Chapter Five**

I gape.

"Wha…what are you talking about?"

He looks at me with wild eyes. "I'm back here, on the island I was on before…the plane…and Mike and Jin. I just…forgot about them…The raft, they blew it up…they stole the kid, Walt. I gotta find 'em." He starts walking back to our camp talking to himself. My mind is reeling, it feels like somebody has taken my brain and replaced it with cotton candy.

"Wait! Sawyer, wait!"

I run after him.

When I finally reach him he is already picking up things and throwing them into a backpack, my backpack.

"Wait, just wait. What are you doing?" I question breathlessly, and I'm not sure if it from chasing him or my complete and utter confusion.

"We gotta go lookin' for them." He shoves the backpack into my hands. I stand there silently, my mouth forming words, but I can't find my voice. This is all happening too quickly.

He turns and looks expectantly at me. "C'mon girly, we don't have all day."

Suddenly I have found my voice. "Just STOP." I take a few steadying breaths and continue, " Can…can you please start again…from the top."

He looks at me like _I'm_ the one that is crazy. "Well…there was this plane, flight 815-"

"815? Oceanic… Sydney to L.A right?" I'm not sure that I want confirmation.

"Yeah…I guess you were in the back, huh? Well I'll be damned." Realization dawns on his face, and I can practically see the cogs in his head turning.

"Oh god-" Suddenly I understand. He was on the plane…the plane crashed.

"So there was a plane crash…we landed on this island, all this weird stuff happened, noises and stuff. Anyway, there's about 40 of us and we start to build a raft, and a couple of us set off tryna find…help I guess. Well there's Mike and his boy Walt, and a Korean guy, Jin. Well this boat finds us, and we thought we were saved, but there was something not right about these guys. They tell us to give them the boy, well no one was happy about that, so I pulled out my gun, but I wasn't quick enough… damn pirate man shot me…it all happened too quick…next thing I knew I wash up on shore here." The calmness in his voice amazes me, and I know that I would not be able to stay so calm if I was telling a story about how I almost died numerous times.

"There's more of you…forty? Where?" There is a strange feeling in the pit of my stomach, as if it has sunk down to the floor.

"Here." He is looking at me so intensely that I feel uncomfortable.

"What? No, that's impossible-"

"On this damn island. They're out there somewhere. That's why we gotta find 'em."

"No…no. No, no, no." I repeat the words like a mantra, trying to buy time to think of a better excuse than simply 'no'.

He grabs me by the shoulders. "Yes. It's true. You don't have to be alone anymore. They'll know what to do." Sawyer confirms this by shaking me, as if he can shake some sense into me. I start to worry about the manic gleam in his eyes.

"Who! Who will know what to do?" The force behind my question startles me, and I wonder how I managed to get the extra energy to do anything more than stare mutely at the man in front of me.

"They will! The other survivors…Jackass, and Locke and Sayid…they'll help."

"Wait, just wait a minute. You want us to go into the scary evil jungle until we happen to stumble across these…other survivors, who can fix everything?"

"Yes!" I finally understand. He isn't mad, he simply has hope. He truly believes that he can find his missing friends, that someone will be able to help us.

I consider my options for a moment. Who am I to ruin someone's hope? What else can I do? I can't let an injured guy waltz off into the jungle alone, well I could, but it's not something I'd be proud of.

I hesitate.

"Just let me pack my stuff, alright."

He looks surprised that I actually agreed so easily. "Alright."

I have a feeling that I might just regret this later on.

"I have a feeling that I might just regret this later on."

* * *

Author's Note: Okie Dokie, thats it, yes i know, very short. Thats becauseI ended up going back to school,I got special allowances for some reason...anyway...I promise the next chapter will be up sooner when a little plot bunny appears and whenI finish school (Tomorrow is our last day!EVER!Muck up day! Whoa...too many exlamation marks lol). AND REMEMBER VOTE FOR PEDRO! I mean, VOTE FOR NEW CHARACTER...now i'm not promising that you'll get who YOU want coz thats impossible to make everyone happy...i'm thinking...a certain person with a funny accent...brutha'. So yeah, review please and tell me what you want...I'm shutting up now.

p.s If anyone says Kate, the answer is already no. lol sorry :) And no Boone! (for obvious reasons)


	6. Chapter 6: I frown

**Disclaimer: **I do not own ANY lost characters...althoughI would very much like to own a certain southern-drawling hottie. Isn't drawling sexy!It's like drawing (which i love) but with an l in the middle. Actually it's completely different.lol!

**Author's Note: **Okay so i lied. I said i would update soon and it has been my longestbreak yet but hey, i just finished highschool, so i have been busy doing important things like making backgrounds for my comp in photoshop of my new obsession Gerard Butler (did someone say SEXEH?), and staying up til 4 in the morning and then waking up at lunch time. You know, important stuff like that. lol (btw SEXEH was my attempt at a scottish accent! lol)

**Blackcat69**: I have a friend that tells me what happens on series 2...its called lol. I love how you alwaysput have a wonderful day at the end of your reviews, it really makes me want to have one to not let you down lol! Have not just a wonderful day, but an amazing super-dooper flippin' sweet day!

**Alateriel567**: Desmond is definately scottish...i know i don't sound like him and i'm an aussie!lol. And i know the actor who plays him is Scottish. When was he in Australia? I only remember him being in America when he met Jack while running at some stadium in Los Angeles...maybe i missed a bit? It's all good, now i have an excuse to watch episodes 1-4 again!Yeah I wish i lived in the U.S right about now...but luckily series 2 is only...3 months away. AAAGGHHHH!

**Darkblaze666: **Hi! The reason i haven't really described Morgan is because 1: she is based on me mostly (and its kinda embarrassing) and 2: i was trying to find a way to describe her but its a bit harder when it is in her perspective, so i'll have to put "i look into the mirror, my god my hair is almost to my bum now!" or something like that.:) Just for you, i'll do a brief description. Morgan is 5'9, has wavy dark brown hair that goes a few inches past the small of her back, Hazel eyes, pale skin (thats why she brings sunscreen in this chapter) and was previously bigger, but has lost about...10-15 pounds so is slim, but not movie-star skinny.(we use kilo's over here, so i hope thats about right.) I hope that is enough..oh and for the pretty or ugly part...well, beauty is in the eye of the beholder isn't it? ;) I love Orlando Bloom too, if that wasn't obvious. haha, i am getting into fangirl mode because the two towers is on t.v for the first time here in Australia, yey, even if i have seen it about...50 times. :)

**Painter815**:Wow, reading this from the beggining topresent end is one long slog! Thanks for saying my story fits, i really wanted it to be able to tie in with the show as much as possible. Yey! You said I have a unique and artistic writing style! i LOVE you! Here...have a cookie! Your vote for hurley has been cast, first hurley vote!Can you imagine, the chick that over-reacts all the time, the sarcastic cowboy and the funny dude...

**phoenix inferno: **LOL, you aren't being stupid...it's pretty hard to know whats happening when you are only up to what, episode...16-17? His name is Desmond, and he had an interesting home on the island i'd say. You'll see in good time...muahahahahahah!. Oh btw, do you have a character you'd like to see make a cameo? So far it is Hurley with 2 and Charlie with1 Vote.

**sausuge**: Okay firstly, i love your name. And i couldn't agree more with you on the Desmond being awesome and loving his accent, and i also couldn't agree with you more about Kate/Sawyer being evil pairing from hell...but she'd be a good character to stir the pot a bit if you think about it. Walt said "Don't push the button...button's bad." when that freaky bit was played backwards. eww...it gave me the shivers. Congrats, you have officially put Hurley in the lead! even if it is only his second vote! lol. I'd like to know what crack you're on and where i can get some! lol kidding. Kids, don't do drugs, drugs are bad. Just say no, yada yada yada.

Okay! on with the show...

**Chapter 6**

I frown.

Sawyer is waiting 'patiently' for me to finish packing, well I'm sure he thinks he is being patient, but I hardly call rolling his eyes and constantly muttering "come on!" and "how long does it take?" under his breath being patient.

I can't help it, there's a lot of stuff to pack.

Okay, so I _can_ help it. The truth is-and I know this is crazy of me- I'm having a hard time leaving here. There is spare clothes and…other important things, books and my sketchbook and other things that have kept me sane.

I sigh.

I have done that a lot lately.

I check over my 'supplies' and pray that they will all fit in my backpack: Clothes, toothbrush, sunscreen, an almost empty water bottle, my little bag of medical supplies and toothpaste. Sawyer told me to pack light…ha! Let's not mention my mp3 player (even if I have no batteries), comb, paper, pencils, a photo and a copy of Tolkien's 'The Lord of the Rings'.

Sawyer keeps saying why the hell do I have to like such a big book. Well, it's not like _he_ has to carry it, so it is fine. I try and pack it all neatly so it can all fit. That's clearly not going to happen, so I get rid of a pair of jeans. I was really hoping to not have to look at my legs which have been razor-less for over 40 days now, and so pale they will blind someone, but I don't really have a choice. I'm _not _getting rid of anything else.

Done. Fantastic. We can go now.

Oh god, this is not fantastic.

I hide all of the other suitcases and luggage under sand and in bushes…maybe, just maybe, we will come back for more stuff.

I jump a little when I hear a voice being cleared very close behind me.

"You ready yet roo girl," Sawyer asks eagerly. "I've only been waitin' almost an _hour_."

"Actually I am ready." I smile smugly up at him.

"Well…what are we waiting for? Let's go!" My god, he is really keen, isn't he? I take one final look around at what has been my home for the last few weeks, and instantly I know why I am so against leaving. I haven't said goodbye.

I throw my backpack on the ground and walk quickly towards the barely noticeable cross sticking out of the ground where the sand and dirt join.

"Hey! Where the hell are you goin' now?"

_To say my last goodbye to the best friend I ever had_ I want to yell, but instead I just ignore him.

My steps slow as I approach the mound. I was never good at farewells. That's why I don't really do them. My throat tightens and that customary burning behind my eyes starts. With every step I take a new memory comes to me.

"_Hi I'm Tegan. This is Katie and Sarah. What's your name?" She is very tall and skinny._

"_Morgan." I don't know what else to say, I'm too nervous._

"_Hi Morgan," she smiles. "You wanna sit with us in health?"_

_I can't believe it, my first day and I already have friends. I smile nervously. "Yeah…sure!" I blush at the completely obvious enthusiasm of my voice._

I stop and read the headstone that I made out of plane wreckage. 'Tegan Collins, the most wonderful person that has ever graced the earth. You will be sadly missed.'

_There's a knock at the door. My god, I'm in my pajamas! I look in the mirror: long brown hair in complete disarray and my embarrassing cow pajama's that are totally unflattering. Oh joy._

_I open the door._

"_Surprise!" I look up to see the beaming faces of Tegan, Katie, Sarah and strangely enough Tegan's mother. I'm too confused to notice when she grabs my hands and puts a little warm bundle in them. I look down and gasp._

"_Oh my god!" The girls are all smiling and laughing now. The tiny black and white kitten is my hands gives an equally tiny meow._

_I am crying now._

"_We know how upset you were when flick died, so we just had to get you another cat. Isn't he adorable!" _

"_Thank you guys so much! I…I don't know what else to say." I laugh._

_They all hug me and it's awkward because they are all trying to avoid squashing the kitten. I feel happy, and I realize I haven't felt so happy in a long, long time._

Tears are threatening to spill as I take a handful of sand and feel it slip through my fingers, just like she did.

_I crawl over to the still figure of Tegan, and push her onto her back. Her blonde hair is matted and tinged red, and blood is seeping from her head. _

"_T…tegan?" I question shakily._

_No response. I shake her and her head lolls to the side. "Tegan, wake up!"_

_I place an ear to her chest…I can't hear a beat._

"_Tegan, please, please wake up," I plead to her, as if it is some sick joke of hers._

_Then I realize that it is me who plays the sick jokes, not her._

_I cover the wound on her head with my hand. "Come on Tig, wake up, you can't leave me…please!"_

I can't recall the moment that I lost control, but I am weeping and my body is flung over the dirt and shaking with sobs. I don't even notice the footsteps crunching behind me.

"I'm so sorry Tegan. It's…it's all m…my fault! I sh-should've never asked you to c-come with me!" I'm crying even harder now, and my throat is dry and sore.

A hand pats me on the shoulder and I look up, startled, to see Sawyer bending down over me, a solemn look on his face.

I sniff and wipe the sand and dirt from my face that had stuck there from the wet tears.

"You," he takes a deep breath "You alright?"

I turn my red puffy eyes to him. "Yeah," I say quietly. "Well…no, actually I'm not."

He seems surprised that I actually said no.

"Oh…okay. Do you…wanna talk about it?" I look at him incredulously, so he continues. "I mean, I 'm not the best person to talk to, but right now I am the only person."

"I'd rather not talk about it right now." He nods, and I can tell that he is feeling uncomfortable, he opened up for a little second, and I shut him down. "But thank you. Does the offer still count at a later date?" I offer a quick smile that doesn't reach my eyes.

It is his turn to look incredulous. "Uh…sure."

There is an awkward silence.

"Oh! Do you want me to ah…give you some…alone time?"

I look back at the 'grave' and bite my lip. "No…I think I have said all I can say to her." I reach around my neck and undo the chain that holds the necklace I have had for years now, not an expensive gift, but valuable to me none the less. I place it on the makeshift headstone. "Don't have _too_ much fun without me, Tig." I almost start crying again, so I quickly turn and try to think of other things. Sawyer looks increasingly uncomfortable. "Right…I'm ready to go now."

He nods and grabs his pack. I do the same. We both turn and face the jungle. Every time I look at it I get a sense of foreboding. "I'm not sure I wanna go in their unarmed." He laughs and pulls something out of his pocket. He quickly flicks the object open.

I flinch.

It's a knife. "Why? You scared of the trees? Well…here ya go, I found it in a pile of 'your' stuff, so I s'pose it's yours."

I hesitantly grab the knife and carefully fold in back in half. I look at Sawyer expectantly. "So…"

He shrugs. "So what?"

"So…where do we go now? You know…this little field trip that we are taking…where do we go?"

"Oh…ahh…well, the thing is-"

"Oh my god! You have no idea, do you?"

"Well not EXACTLY…but I have a rough idea."

I feel a headache coming on. "Okay, well let's just…just move." I squeeze the knife tight and start towards the jungle, leaving a shocked Sawyer in my wake.

"Hey! You don't know where you're going," he yells as he catches up to me.

I snigger.

"Neither do you," I point out.

"Yeah well…"

I roll my eyes and continue trekking through the trees.

I hope Sawyer is good for _something._

* * *

**A.N**: Done and Done! hehe, i just realized that they havent even set off yet! lol. Review please! and you can vote more than once for the guest appearance, but not for the same person...so VOTE:) 


	7. Chapter 7: I fall

**Disclaimer:**Insert something sarcastic/humerous/witty about not owning Lost or any of its characters.

**Author's Note:** Muahaha! You guys will be shocked at the end of this chappie...i hope. Okay so Desmond is yet to make an appearance, but he is definately in the next one, or maybe even this one...

**Sausage:** Your sister isn't psycho, she just has good taste if she like Gerard Butler...exceptI just saw some screencaps of a film in which he HUMPS a CAMEL...a CAMEL!lucky camel:( lol! Thanks for the heads up on the site, i'll make sure to check it out.

**Painter815:** Thanks!I like the way i write Sawyer too, well, i like anything about Sawyer lol. I had to ask my friend if i could use her in a story lol, i was like "oh btw you die like...straight away." Kate! you voted for KATE! That is good and bad, considering i hate her, well, dislike her, hate is too strong a word. But it is good coz it certainly stirs things up a little...even if Kate doesn't appear as the cameo character...i'm pretty sure she'll be in it later on anyway.

**Darkblaze666: **Thanks for the review! Yes Tegan is my real friend and the kitten part was true, but the way we met was much more bizarre..lol, so i took a few liberties with that part. And of course she isn't really dead, lol, so that last part is completely made up.

**Brenenna: **Wow, i made you cry? I'm sorry, I think, although that was the mood i was going for. I suppose Shannon does know what Morgan went through, and i think Shannon would be fun to write too. Thanks for the review, i had a bit of trouble with the last chapter so thanks for the compliment:)

**phoenix inferno: **Ha ha! i see you like Charlie a LOT. Tell you what, even if he doesn't win, i'll make sure he is in the story, okay? As a present for always reviewing for every chapter. lol.

**Blackcat69: **You are so...bubbly...i wish i was that happy all the time. :) I love cats too...but when we were moving my cat ran away, and i haven't seen him since...it was 3 months ago:( . I will have a nice day, coz its the Melbourne Cup races today and my mum just won $170 on a horse called Makaybe Diva! They have the dumbest names...anyway, thanks for the review!

* * *

**Chapter 7**

I fall.

"Bloody hell!" I mutter as I get up from the dirty ground. Sawyer simply laughs.

"That's…what, the third time now," he asks, trying to hide a grin.

"It's these damn shoes!"

"Yeah, sure it is," he agrees sarcastically. "Well, whether it's your shoes or your damn failure to walk normally…can you fix it? Stomping around like an elephant is probably not the best thing to do in _this_ place," he scolds.

This is one of the first times he has shown some maturity, and it makes me remember that he is nearly ten years older than me. '_You're still a kid'_, that's what he had said earlier. _Why do I even care? And even more importantly,why am I blushing?_

"Fine." I pull of my shoes and slam them into his chest, hard. "You hold them if they're bothering you so much." I walk away, silently, now that my shoes are off.

"I ain't carrying your damn shoes," he protests, shoes in hand.

"Well, actually you are, besides I don't have any room in my bag."

"Well, I ain't holding them so…take the damn things."

"Alright, I'll put them in _your_ bag."

"Fine."

I unzip his bag, and squash down its contents when something catches my eye. I pull it out and gape.

It's a gun.

I drop it as if it is poisonous. It is about now I realize that I don't know who or what the hell this man is.

"Hey, what's taking so long?" he inquires.

"Why do you have a gun in your bag," I ask with a slightly shaky voice.

Sawyer stiffens and turns his head the side. "What?"

I round on him. "Why the _hell_ do you have a bloody _gun_ in your bag!"

"Why the hell were you goin' through my stuff? All you were supposed to be doin' was puttin-"

I bend down a pick the gun up. "Answer me! Why?" I try my best to look imposing as I point the gun at him. I might just look it if my bloody arm wasn't shaking so much.

"It's not mine-"

"Well who's is it then?"

"We had a U.S marshal on the plane. He died, I took his gun."

"Why'd you take it?"

"'cause of friggen nuts like you! I don't know about you darlin', but I actually want to stay alive and get off this damn island. So that," he indicates with his head to the gun in my hand, "seemed like a good thing to have with me."

I calm down a little. "Okay, are there…any-" _oh c'mon woman, sound a little more scared why don't you?_ I try to stop the slight tremor in my voice." Are there any…you know… bullets in it?"

Sawyer lets out a loud noise that could only be described as a guffaw. He stops when I point the gun down at his nether-region. "You act like you ain't never seen a gun before…you have, right?"

I smile. _If only you knew, you wouldn't think I was such a child after all_. " I've seen a gun…I've felt a gun. I've felt one digging into my skin; I've heard the trigger cock back... Maybe that's why I'm a little…anxious around them," I admit dryly, and it gives me some kind of sick pleasure to see Sawyer's grin slide of his face and be replaced with wide eyes and an open mouth.

"Hey, don't feel too bad…it happened a long time ago. So…how do I get these bullets out then?"

"You shoot it," comes his sarcastic reply. Wow he recovers fast.

"Don't tempt me…I just might."

"You don't have it in ya" he taunts.

I don't dignify that with an answer, perhaps because he is right.

"There's a button on the side, press it, and the magazine will fall out. Then, hold the grip thing and pull out the top of the gun. But I wouldn't be doing that if I were you."

"Why not?" I ask suspiciously.

"Well maybe you forgot, but were out here in the jungle of mystery. There is somethin' out there that is makin' those damn noises; not to mention the polar bear I shot out here once."

"What? A polar bear? I may not know where I am but I do know that we aren't in bloody Antarctica."

Sawyer rolls his eyes. "It's a long story."

"Well, we have all the time in the world, unless you have some other place to be."

"I'll tell you what, you stop pointing that thing at my bits and then we can chat, alright with you sweet cheeks?"

I reluctantly lower the gun. "Don't call me sweet cheeks, or darlin' or roo girl; I have a name for a reason."

He completely ignores me as if I hadn't even spoken and slowly, very slowly walks closer to me. "So anyway girly, we were walkin' through the jungle and all of a sudden there is this noise in the bushes. Everyone starts running, but not me. I pull out my gun and take it like a man. Out pops this damn polar bear, and it's coming straight for me, and then BANG, BANG, BANG. No more bear." It occurs to me that Sawyer is probably a very dangerous man. He yanks the gun out of my hand.

"Hey! What are you doing…if you shoot me…" _wow, I'm really great at threats._

"You'll what? Whine my ear off? Well you do that now anyway so it's really no difference," Sawyer remarks maliciously as he points the gun at me.

"Sawyer, stop mucking around. Don't be an idiot."

"I never muck around," He says seriously.

"Please…I…I helped you. I _saved_ you. You would've died if it wasn't for me. Put the gun down, please Sawyer, before you do something you'll regret." Sawyer doesn't react well to what I've just said and I mentally kick myself.

He laughs, and the sheer coldness of it makes me shiver. "You didn't _save_ me, you almost _killed_ me." He rounds on me and we are almost touching. "And you have _no idea_ what I'd do, what I have _done_, to survive."

I feel coldness in the pit of my stomach; oh no, it's the gun digging into my ribs. I'm going to die. Sawyer is going to kill me. I'm going to die. I don't want to die. I trusted a complete stranger and now I'm going to die. Tears spring up in my eyes and my chin begins to tremble.

"Here is some advice darlin', never trust anyone. People lie, and cheat, and kill, and that's how the world is. So you either learn to lie, cheat and kill, or you die. You didn't learn quick enough."

I tremble.

The gun cocks back. He squeezes the Trigger.


	8. Chapter 8: I die

**Disclaimer:** Noting has changed since the last chapter...

**Author's Note:** Sorry about the delay, i felt thatthis chapter was too...crappy. But oh well...

**Aaaagghhh! i had one replyto yourreviews to go and then my comp forze and shut down! so thankyou all for reviewing, and i will do personal ones a little later when i am less annoyed at my stupid computer. **

**Previously on Lost:**

"Here is some advice darlin', never trust anyone. People lie, and cheat, and kill, and that's how the world is. So you either learn to lie, cheat and kill, or you die. You didn't learn quick enough."

I squeeze my eyes shut. I hear the gun cock back. He squeezes the Trigger.

* * *

**Chapter Eight.**

I Die.

Bang.

Dead.

People say that when you die your life flashes before your eyes, all I could see was black. Endless black.

Perhaps this was because I wasn't dead.

My eyes flicker open and lock instantly on to Sawyer's smirking face. I look down and inspect the wound. I don't_ feel_ like I was shot. I don't _look_ like I was shot.

I wasn't shot. For some miraculous reason I am alive.

I look up at Sawyer and am surprised to see him with his fist practically shoved into his mouth to stop himself from laughing.

Oh.My.God.

My mouth works silently for words as I try to comprehend what the hell just happened.

"Oh god, don't look at me like that. It was just a joke…I couldn't help myself," he explains whilst still giggling like a little schoolgirl.

I look at Sawyer in complete shock and disbelief.

"What? It's you're fault…you gave me the idea. I just took the bullets out myself…but then you went all 'oh my god sawyer are you gonna shoot me!' and, I suppose, inspiration struck." At least he has the dignity to have stopped laughing at this point.

My face transforms from shock into rage and disgust. I am literally trembling with anger as I try my best not to lunge at him. My restraint doesn't last long.

"You sick BASTARD," I scream as I jerk forward and attack him.

I slap, punch, kick, jab and scratch any part of him that I can get my hands on. I am no longer screaming coherent words as I attack him, just inane ramblings and noises.

Eventually he grabs hold of my arms and I am unable to continue, physically drained. I notice that his old bullet wound is freshly bleeding and he now has long scratches down his arms. I can feel his skin under my nails.

Sawyer pushes me backwards and my back crashes against a tree trunk. I cry out in pain as I feel the gnarled roots and branches break the skin.

"If you ever, _ever_, hit me again, you won't even _live_ to regret it." Sawyer leans in, and for one fleeting moment I think that he is going to kiss me. The thought both thrills and repulses me. At the last moment he turns so that his mouth is now near my ear. "Understand?" The arrogance in his voice makes me want to do a Mike Tyson and bite his damn ear off, that'd show him just how much I understand.

"You're sick. You're a _sick_ asshole. You are deranged and twisted and…and…you're filth." His eyes snap on mine at the last word, and his left hand almost grabs at my throat, almost, but never quite touches. I can see him shaking as he holds himself back from strangling me to death. He must know that I am baiting him. "Understand," I ask sarcastically.

He slaps me, hard, across the face, and my head snaps to the side. A strange noise akin to both a sob and a laugh escapes my mouth. I succeeded in baiting him, and for that I am glad, but I didn't expect it to hurt so much. When I look back at him I am surprised to see that we both have mirrored faces of shock. His eyes also held something else, what was that, remorse? He instantly lets go of me and takes a few steps backwards.

I am surprised that I can still stand without some support, that is how badly my legs are shaking. The physical blow of the slap wasn't too bad, I've been slapped before, but seeing Sawyer lose complete control was shocking to even himself it seemed. He is running his hand through his hair repetitively and pacing, shaking his head as if he is having some inner battle.

"I'm not like him, I'm not. I'm not like him, I'm not," Sawyer mumbles as he paces, repeating the words like a mantra.

"I think things…got a little out of hand, Sawyer." The sound of his name snaps him out of his reverie and he looks at me sharply.

"I just…it was meant to be a joke. I…I didn't think." Was that an apology? I think it almost counts as one.

"You're damn right you didn't think! I thought…I was so scared. I thought I was going to die! That is not a good joke, Sawyer." I reproach, but it lacks most of the venom that I would usually have.

"You think I don't know that now? It was a dumb thing to do, I get it," he starts to look uneasy, "I…you just went all nuts on me, so I fought back. I didn't…I didn't mean to hit you like that." He won't even look me in the eye. Wow, I think he might actually _mean_ this.

I let the words sink in, and take a note to remember this moment, the moment where Sawyer actually showed remorse for something he did. "I'm sorry too. I just…I couldn't restrain myself…you just laughed and…and I went a little crazy. Does it hurt?" I indicate his shoulder which is now bleeding again.

"Nah, I can take it." He steps closer to me. "Did I…hurt you?" he looks pointedly at the left side of my face.

"What? Oh that…Nah, don't flatter yourself. I've had worse hits from my…well, it was more shock than anything." I shrug; the movement causes me to remember the sharp pain in my back.

"You've had worse hits from who?" he asks seriously, crossing his arms, and for the first time I remember that he has a gun in his hand still.

"Oh…you know, girl fights...that sort of thing," I answer vaguely.

"Girl fights?" he questions skeptically.

"Anyway…we should probably get a move on-"

"Here, take these, this gun is completely useless now, so maybe we can get along a little better." Sawyer hands me the magazine, and I put it in my front pocket.

"Yeah, well at least not try and kill eachoth-"

"Put the gun down, Brotha', or I'll blow your damn head off."

Sawyer and I both turn and look in the direction the voice came from.

I stare.

Standing about four meters away from us is a man holding a gun, pointed directly at Sawyer.

* * *

**A/N:** Dun Dun Duuuuuuuun...who could it be? I think it is pretty obvious who it is...for those who have seen some of series two. I Think that last line of the 'mystery character' is from the show...just so i'm not stealing it. :)

Review please:)


	9. Authors note & preview

**Author's Note:** Hey everone, deleting that chapter that was only an authors note totally backfired on me! (pout) i was doing the right thing! things really arent going my way today...

Oh, so i don't get in trouble i will put a little from the next chappie up here, that alright then, isn't it?

Pretty much ignore this chappie haha, it is just filler.

Anyway, here is a sneak squiz at the next chappie...haha...no one cares, but i gotsta do this.

* * *

"_Alright Morgan, now no fuss this time. I've already crushed them up for you so no excuses anymore."_

_I look up. It's Ann today, I like Ann. I resume my drawing._

"_Morgan, come on. You're making this harder than it needs to be. Just take the medicine and then you can come out and watch some television…or go for a walk-"_

"_with a supervisor," I add._

_Ann sighs. "Yes with a supervisor. Or, I can call in some help and use a more forceful approach." Ann is terrible at threats, she's too nice. That's why it surprised me the last time I fought back when she actually did what she threatened to do._

"_By 'more forceful' you mean getting those big thug security guys to hold me down while you shove it down my throat, don't you?"_

"_Just take it, please. We don't want a repeat of last Thursday, now do we?" Ha! Now wasn't that a blast._

_I wonder what concoction they've mixed up for me today? I grab the cup and empty the contents into my mouth, then take a swig of water from the accompanying cup of water and swallow._

"_Mmm….nice. Slightly woody, with a hint of berry and a dash of…vanilla I believe, that must be a vintage '92" I state sarcastically. "Give my regards to the chef, an excellent choice."_

_Ann rolls her eyes. "You're quite smart Morgan, when you want to be. Now, if we could get you to use it for good things rather than pissing off the staff, you might actually get out of here."_

_Oh god, here we go. "I don't piss ALL of the staff off…Just you. Your special." I grace her with a huge smile._

"_Well…as fun as this is, I have other patients to see…be good now Morgan."_

* * *

ooh! morgan's a bit nutty! haha, that is so true... : P 


	10. Chapter 9: I freeze

**THIS IS THE SAME CHAPTER, BUT BECAUSE I DELETED THE PREVIOUS AUTHOR'S NOTE MOST OF YOU COULDN'T REVIEW THISCHAPPIE! SO I REPOSTED IT. OOPS...DAMN CAPSLOCK! PLEASE REVIEW THIS TIME:D:D:D**

**Disclaimer:**I don't own LOST, i don't own Desmond, I don't own Sawyer (pout), because if i did i would be off in Italy whilst Sawyer woo's me with his southern charm. bwahahahaha! (sigh). I do own Tegan, haha, don't i pigsticks? you know it.I do own Morgan, although i have been trying to get rid of her...

**Author's Note:** I'm sorry but exams have been busy so i can't really reply to all of the reviews at the moment. i will reply if a question is asked or you state that you want me to...haha which i'm sure you all do lol. This chapter was so hard to write...I literally forced myself to do it in about...2 hours or so, so i hope it is alright.

Thanks to everyone for the reviews!I am one away from 50, which is something i never expected, so thankyou all very much! Cookies for all!

**phoenix inferno:** I will certanily have a look at your fic, the fact that you want to hear what i think about it is very flattering. :) haha, stoopid sun.

**baudelaire7**: Yes, Desmond seems to have popped in for a chat. Now i'm sure it was totally unexpected as it's not like i have been saying that he will be in my fic in about the previous...4 chapters or so lol. I am the queen of subtlety.

**Painter815:** Sawyer isn't as tough as he would like to be, well atleast thats what i think. Besides, he hadn't shown much emotion other than anger or humour so i thought i'd better pull out the big guns.lol. Thanks again for the lovely review.

**KateLilly**: I will wrote more, i hope you like this chappie. ISN'T CAPS LOCK GREAT! lol, sorry, please don't take offence.

**Blackcat69:** Hey, i checked out your Xanga account as you know coz i sent you an e-mail which makes you question whether or not i am stalking you lol.

**Sawyerslover:** I actually have a question for you, are you being sarastic or serious. Thanks though, your review is my first that resembles a flame. Sorry that my Sawyer is not to your liking. Oh and Yes, dah, it is Desmond. Good observation skills, as its not like i made 99 percent obvious as to who it was.

**Darkblaze666:** lol, Desmond is the only scottish person i know of that says brotha'...i think he is confused as to what nationality he is.

**homeric:** Isn't Sawyer everyone's favourite character?Thanks for the heads up, i shall delete it now.

**Alateriel567:** Whoa, yes it was a long review but it was pretty error free. Besides, long reviews ar nice once in a while. haha...don't worry, i already know who dies throught my...connections.

**sausage:**haha, i totally would have castrated Sawyer; destroyed what he loves most lol. I don't know where you are tellin desmond to go, but isn't he cool? It's weird, if it were Ana-Lucia that was the person with the Gun, everyone would be like 'kill her now!' but because it is desmond people are kinda on his side, even me! Maybe its coz Desmond is funny and sarcastic and has an awesome accent...maybe that is also just me lol.

**Pigsticks:** LOL, even after i read the name and the comment it still took a while for me to realize who this was! haha...umm considering as i make this story up as i go, i have no idea how long it will go for...most likely til either i have no plot left or ppl stop reading! Aww shucks, i'm blushing, don't call me Lady Lovelace, its embarrassing! Love ya too-xoxoxo. Oh for all those people going 'what the?', this is the infamous Tegan!

okay so i just replied to all of the reviews this time...on to the MAIN EVENT!

* * *

**Chapter Nine**

I freeze.

My mind is racing. Who the hell is this guy? And where the hell did he come from?

"I said put the gun down, or I'll shoot," orders the man. His eyes dart to me, then back to Sawyer, and back to me again. He has a manic glint in his eyes, and that combined with a gun is never a good thing.

I've seen that look before, in the mirror.

"_Alright Morgan, now no fuss this time. I've already crushed them up for you so no excuses anymore."_

_I look up. It's Ann today, I like Ann. I resume my drawing._

"_Morgan, come on. You're making this harder than it needs to be. Just take the medicine and then you can come out and watch some television…or go for a walk-"_

"_with a supervisor," I add._

_Ann sighs. "Yes with a supervisor. Or, I can call in some help and use a more forceful approach." Ann is terrible at threats, she's too nice. That's why it surprised me the last time I fought back when she actually did what she threatened to do._

"_By 'more forceful' you mean getting those big thug security guys to hold me down while you shove it down my throat, don't you?"_

"_Just take it, please. We don't want a repeat of last Thursday, now do we?" Ha! Now wasn't that a blast._

_I wonder what concoction they've mixed up for me today? I grab the cup and empty the contents into my mouth, then take a swig of water from the accompanying cup of water and swallow._

"_Mmm….nice. Slightly woody, with a hint of berry and a dash of…vanilla I believe, that must be a vintage '92" I state sarcastically. "Give my regards to the chef, an excellent choice."_

_Ann rolls her eyes. "You're quite smart Morgan, when you want to be. Now, if we could get you to use it for good things rather than pissing off the staff, you might actually get out of here."_

_Oh god, here we go. "I don't piss ALL of the staff off…Just you. Your special." I grace her with a huge smile._

"_Well…as fun as this is, I have other patients to see…be good now Morgan."_

"_Always am." Okay, so that's a lie. "Oh Ann? Is Sean here today? He said he'd see me," I say, trying to sound like I don't care. I fail miserably._

"_You know he doesn't work on Saturday's."_

"_I meant as a visitor." Ann smiles sadly at me and leaves the room._

_It was stupid of me to think he would come, after all, I'm just a patient to him now, nothing more._

_I look in the mirror, well not a mirror, just a piece of shiny metal that is drilled to the wall. I look terrible, but sane. You can always tell if a person is crazy, because it's in there eyes. Then again, a crazy person doesn't know they're crazy, do they?_

_I can feel my brain slowing, the medicine must be taking effect. I'm so _tired

_I realize as I try to stifle a yawn that there is some type of sleeping pill in that damn medicine._

_Bloody Ann._

"Do you want me to shoot your girlfriend here brotha'? Drop the bloody gun!" Why does he keep saying brother, isn't he Scottish? Well…he is rather insane.

"I'm not his girlfriend," I state inattentively. I am thinking about more important things, like how to stay alive.

"Sorry?" He looks very confused.

"I said I'm not his girlfriend." I look at Sawyer. He is giving one of those 'what the hell are you doing' kind of looks.

"Oh I heard you; I just didn't understand why you'd argue with a guy holding a _gun_." He has a good point, I realize a little too late.

"What's there to stop ya from shooting me once I put it down, laddie?" Wow, he comes up with nicknames even under pressure. The man truly is amazing.

"Nothing. But there's nothing stopping me from shooting you right now either," the warning in his voice doesn't go unnoticed. Sawyer still doesn't budge.

"Sawyer drop the gun!" This really isn't the time for heroics.

"God dammit, your on his side!" He looks incredulously at me.

"I'm not on anyone's 'side', now put the bloody gun down before you get shot again!" If anyone should be looking incredulous, it should be me!

"You two just shut it! You," he looks at Sawyer, "put the gun down, and you," he looks at me now, "just…be a good girl, right?" If he wasn't pointing a gun, I'd tell him just how I feel about being called 'girl', but right now it doesn't seem a good idea.

"Always am," I say in mock sweetness.

Sawyer drops the gun finally. "It doesn't have any damn bullets in it anyway."

"Righ', now get on the ground, and don't try anythin' or I'll shoot."

My god, why is this happening to me? I get down on the ground, Sawyer reluctantly does also. "I assure you Sawyer, that this is the only time we shall be lying on the ground together."

"You're cracking jokes _now_?" He looks at me and I can see that he doesn't find the situation amusing. Well its all Karma isn't it? That's what he gets for playing such a stupid prank.

"Well…being held at gunpoint seems to be a common occurrence for me lately, maybe I'm getting- Ouch!" I feel a sharp pain in my arm.

"It doesn' hurt tha' much. I've been usin' it for years now." The scary gun-wielding man is now behind me.

"What the hell did you just put in me?"

"Medicine…for the sickness," he says cautiously.

"What sickness? I'm not sick." Not that I know of.

"That's what the doctor said too…But you can't stay on this island long before you get i', and I don't much wanna' risk it." Its about now that I realize this guy is more cynical that I am. That's quite an accomplishment.

"Why, you care about my life now," I ask sarcastically.

"No, I care about _my_ life."

This guy must be mental I decide, just as my hands are getting tied behind my back. He then proceeds to do the same to Sawyer, except that Sawyer struggles a lot more. He is thrashing and wriggling, making it impossible for the man to tie him. The man just whacks him across the head with his gun and Sawyer is knocked out cold.

"Oh my god! What are you doing to him," I yell to the man, who completely ignores me and injects Sawyer with the 'medicine'. I can't properly read the label, but it doesn't seem to be anything I can remember. I should know, after all, I am quite the expert when it comes to medication.

"Is he sick?" the man asks me.

"What?"

"Is he sick, as in ill, as in going to die?" I really don't like this guys sarcasm.

"Ummm…not that I know of, unless of course he dies from concussion. Why do you think we are sick?"

"Because they all get sick, all of them." He moves closer to me. "Are you sick?"

"No."

He grabs my face and stares long and hard into it. Why the hell does this whacko think that I am sick, when clearly it is him? He has very dark intense eyes, and they unnerve me.

"Yes you are…I can see it."

"I'm not sick!"

"_Okay, now look to your left." God, does that bloody torch have to be so bright and so in my face?_

"_Right. Well, you seem to be improving, but your attitude towards a majority of the other patients and staff is not helping your situation." He doesn't even look at me while he says this._

"_Perhaps it is their attitudes towards me," I say pointedly._

"_Why? Do you feel you have been treated unfairly by any of the staff? " A hint of concern enters his voice._

"_Well…there is this one doctor. He's about…6ft tall, brown hair, very young. He never answers any of my questions, and he pretends that he doesn't know me-"_

_Concern turns into weariness. "Morgan, Don't. We've been through this a thousand times, it's-"_

"'_strictly prohibited that a doctor and patient have anything other than a doctor/patient relationship.' I know, you tell me every single time."_

"_I could lose my job over this. I'm finally getting somewhere, I'll be a real doctor, not just an assistant."_

"_Please Sean, I've known you since I was eight. You can't just…ignore a ten year friendship!" I'm getting angry again, but I can't help it._

"_We haven't been friends for over two years now Morgan." Ouch, that hurts._

"_Oh god Sean, that was a stupid mistake. I tried to apologize so many times and you wouldn't-"_

"_You knew how I felt about you and you played me for a fool. I _let_ you play me for a fool. I'm sorry Morgan, but I won't let that happen again." Pain is evident in his voice, and his expression. I understand now, that is why he is doing it._

"_Sean please, I don't want you to hate me," I beg._

"_I don't hate you Morgan, I pity you." His eyes certainly seem to say otherwise._

"_Don't say that." The anger is welling up again._

"_You're sick and you need help." He gets up to leave._

"_I'm not sick!"_

_Sean sighs. "I have to go. I'll be back next Tuesday Morgan." The door bangs shut and echoes through the bare room._

"_I'M NOT SICK!"_

"Alrigh' alrigh', your 'not sick'. Either way I'm not takin' any chances." He helps me stand up. It's nice to be standing again. He gets another piece of rope and ties one end to the piece binding my hands and the other to Sawyer's feet.

"What are you doing?"

"Well, we can't just leave your friend here, now can we? Now move." He indicates with his head the direction he wants us to go in.

He expects _me_ to be able to drag _Sawyer_? My god he is more insane than I first thought.

I laugh.

He's got to be joking.

"You've got to be joking."

* * *

**WOW...that was a long chapter. Review please:D a whole toothy smile an' all that time.** Sorry about the confusion!


	11. Chapter 10: I grunt

**Author's Note:** Sorry it has taken so long, i've been...err...well, i just officially graduated form highschool so i have been 'relaxing' for the past few days. :P This chapter is what some would call 'filler', but i like to think of it as a great spot to put shameless flirting and sarcasm and all those wonderful things! OH and PLEASE check out my other little tiny teeny ficcie called "Thank god it's friday", it's about Morgan and an encounter with someone from the crash...sound interesting, i hope so! lol. If i get a couple more reviews i'll do some with other character's too.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Lost, I don't own anything, i don't even own a car, or this computer...wow THAT is kinda depressing.

Thankyou so much for all the reviws guys (well actually i should say girls), i really really appreciate it. :P I was wondering how the whole mental patient thing would go down...WHY she was in a mental ward will be explained later on too.

**ZELINA**: I think there have been really small moments where Sawyer has shown a little sympathy, like when he and mike where on the raft and...well i can't remember what was said, but he is getting softer. I am glad you think Morgan isn't a mary-sue, I'm not offended by you listing her flaws, i actually appreciate it! Thanks for your review :D

**Raven2004**: Thanks, i'm glad i made you laugh at the kotex bit! Im not glad that you almost choked though...but it is kind of flattering! Sorry about the abrupt ending...i have a problem with going on and on until the chapter is about 3000 words. : )

**Meagan4Dominic:** I can't tell you if i'd kill Sawyer off...you'll just have to read! ; )

**Thanks also to: **Blackcat69 (yep i got you're e-mail), sawyerz babe (thanks!), sausuge (you are so crazy! lol), phoenix inferno (dom andevi snogging? at least it's not her and Josh Holloway snogging!), Darkblaze666 (he he i suppose desmond is a freak, but i love him anyway), Lady Venya of the isle (thanks:P ), baudelaire7 (i don't mind if you find morgan being a mental patient cool) and Painter 815 (I'm gladyou enjoyMorgan's backstory!).

* * *

**Chapter Ten**

I grunt.

What the hell is this guy made of? I mean I know he is rather big, but it feels like I'm lugging a baby elephant along.

The burning sensation on my wrists is starting to be replaced with a numbness that most likely isn't a good thing. If I was alone and in this much pain, I'd be crying, but there is no way in hell I am shedding a tear with this guy.

"Can we please stop? I can't…can't keep going," I beg breathlessly.

The man turns towards me and sighs. "You're tryin' to make this hard, aren't yeh?" he asks in his think Scottish brogue.

I look at him in disbelief . "This IS hard! You are making me drag a full grown man through the _jungle_! Sorry if I'm taking a while, but it isn't something I've had much practice with."

He chuckles. "You're definitely Australian aren't yeh?" he asks, cocking his head to the side.

I narrow my eyes. "Yes, why?"

"Well you're ability to complain about everythin', and try and whine your way out of anythin' involving physical movement gave it away. Along with you're accent."

"You are so lucky that my hands are tied right now," I threaten, trying to sound menacing.

"Are you always like this, or have I just caught you on a bad day?" he asks, amused.

"Bad day? Oh no, today has been just peachy, a real blast," I say sarcastically.

"Does it not tire you, being so sarcastic?"

"One could ask the same question to you," I point out.

"Or one could start movin' again. Break time's over, giddy up." And with that he sets off through the jungle, me lugging behind.

Minutes pass with nothing but the occasional bird call and the steady rhythm of our combined footfalls, but once in a while Sawyer moans and I check to see if he is awake. Nope, still out cold. I hope he wakes up soon, I can imagine how raw my wrists are…wow my face is itchy. Maybe if I don't think about it then it'll go away. I wonder what Sawyer's thinking about while I lug him around the jungle? Okay, it is still itchy. I try and wipe my face on my shoulder, but I can't reach the spot.

I growl.

The noise catches the man's attention. "What's wrong with you now?"

"I have an itchy nose. It's driving me crazy."

He just laughs, he_ laughs_ at my pain.

"Well?" I question expectantly.

"Well what?" he raises an eyebrow.

"Well…can you, you know, scratch it for me?" I ask warily.

"You want me to scratch your nose?" he asks, a grin slapped on his face.

"Yes. Perhaps you have forgotten, my hands are literally tied at the moment," I snap.

"Errr…"

"Oh god, I'm not asking you to have my babies! If you're scared of getting 'girl germs' I have no problem with you using your sleeve."

He ponders this for a moment before finally agreeing. "I suppose I could do that."

He leans forward and scratches my nose, not looking me in the eyes.

The itchiness dies away. "Thankyou. That's the best I've ever had." I say, smiling cheekily at him.

He looks surprised. "Are you flirtin' with me? I know I've been away from women for a while, but-"

"No, it was just a joke," I insist.

"Good, because no amount of flirtin' is gonna get that rope off you."

"Damn, it was all part of my evil plan. You know, first it's scratch my nose, then scratch my neck, then god knows what I'll be asking you to scratch."

He laughs. "You're terrible, you are."

"Actually, I'm Morgan."

"Hello Morgan, I'm Desmond." He sticks his hand out. "Oh…right, your hands," he finishes lamely. Perhaps flirting is a way to get out of this damn situation after all…

"I really hate to interrupt your little chat here, but what the hell is goin' on?" A voice that is distinctly Sawyer says.

"Sawyer! You're awake…thank god." I kneel down beside him.

He looks surprised. "You're certainly happy to see me."

"Do you know how heavy you are?"

"Oh well it's nice to know you care so much," he says dryly.

"That's okay sweetie." I smirk.

"I can knock myself out again if you two wanna keep playin' the old 'I'll show you mine if you show me yours' game." He smirks, and it is much better than mine.

"Would you? 'Cause you've been awake for about ten seconds and you've already succeeded in being an ass," I say harshly.

"You know what? You're a whole lot nicer in my dreams."

"What?"

"Oh nothin'." He grins that arrogant bloody grin he loves so much.

"You've been dreaming about me? Wow, that's kind of awkward and funny at the same time."

"Oh if you knew what the dream was about then I'm sure you'd feel a lot more awkward, darlin'."

I narrow me eyes, and try to hide the blush I can feel coming. "You're really good at annoying the shit out of me."

"At least I'm good at somethin'."

"Excuse me? It's almost dark, you can have your little reunion later, right?" Desmond snaps.

"Sure, when you untie me from him, we'll keep going."

"Sorry?" confusion is clear on his dark face.

"You heard me, untie me from him, we'll move a hell of a lot faster if I'm not stuck pulling THAT for another few kilometers," I say, trying to sound logical.

"Do you mind not calling me 'that', I am a human being, ya know," Sawyer grumbles.

"Could've fooled me," I retort.

Alright, Alright! If you two stop arguing like a married couple." Desmond unties the rope connecting Sawyer and I.

"Okay, now can I have my hands tied at the front? It's a lot easier than having you scratch any itches I get for the next…however long it takes." I know I'm pushing my luck, but this idea could actually work.

"I'll be glad to help scratch any itches you got, sweetie," Sawyer remarks in a way he probably believes to be charming.

Oh god. He's back on form already.

I completely ignore his idiotic remark, and the warmness in my cheeks, and turn to Desmond. "So, will you?"

"No funny business, right?"

"No funny business," I say resolutely.

As soon as I fee the rope slack I hook my left arm around and punch the man, Desmond, right in the face. He twists to the side and almost manages to not fall over. I leap forward, and pin him to the ground, my arms holding his and my legs squashing his together as hard as I can. "Was that funny?" I ask breathlessly.

"Bitch."

"Look, I don't wanna have to tie you up like some prisoner, but if you aren't going to cooperate then I don't really have a choice."

"What do you mean you're not gonna tie him up? The guy's insane!"

"Sawyer, please stay out of this, the adults need to talk, okay?"

"He's right, you are a bitch."

"So, either you can help us, and we can all stay rope-less _or_ you can cause trouble and see just how raw _your_ wrists get when I tie you up."

Desmond thinks for a while. "How do I know you won't kill me?"

"Don't you think I would've done it by now? Besides, what's there to stop you from killing us? You, after all, are the gun wielding maniac who just randomly popped out of the jungle."

"Okay, I'll…I promise I won't run away and I won't try to kill you."

"And you won't tie us up again?" I ask skeptically.

"And I won't tie you up again."

I stick my hand out. "Deal."

"Deal,"he states. "Now will you get off me?"

I get up off Desmond and dust myself off as I walk over to Sawyer. "Now, are you going to be a good boy?" I ask, smiling condescendingly.

"Just get it off me."

"What's the magic word?" I say in mock-sweetness.

"Now!"

"Didn't your mother teach you any manners?" I ask as I undo the rope at his feet and hands.

"Don't you dare talk about my mother," he growls in a low, dangerous voice.

There is an awkward silence for a while, and Sawyer breaks it by forcefully pushing himself up off the ground. I jerk backwards to avoid getting knocked down.

"Look, it's getting dark. We can't go on any further, and I don't know about you, but I'm really quite tired."

"She's right, we should find somewhere safe to sleep the night," Desmond states matter-of-factly.

Ten minutes later we are sitting in a shallow ditch surrounded thickly by trees and leafy shrubs. Desmond is sitting opposite me, eating from a tin of food that looks to be baked beans. My stomach rumbles just from the sight. Where did he get that from anyway? There's a funny symbol on the tin, like a weird hexagon.

Desmond notices that I'm looking at him and smiles, so I snap my eyes away and look at the leafy ground. He pokes me with his finger and offers me the tin. "You can have the rest, if you'd like." I lick my lips and look towards Sawyer, who is still glowering, but now at me.

"Okay, thanks." I take the tin and tip it upside down. It is as if I am eating the most delicious, tasty meal in the world. I remember myself eventually, and reluctantly hand the tin to Sawyer. He stares at the almost empty tin, then up at me, and then at the tin again. Eventually he grabs the tin from me and eats. I wonder as I watch him if _my_ face looked quite so hilarious. He has sauce dripping down his chin and I think I spot the smallest of grins on his face.

"You didn't have to give us any, you know?" I tell Desmond, who is now lying down.

"I know."

I frown. Perhaps I was a little harsh on the guy; he doesn't seem to be crazy after all. I grab a shirt from my pack and cover myself with it.

I yawn.

I lie down and close my eyes, trying to find a comfortable position. I wonder why Sawyer had dreamt about me, or more importantly, what I had been _doing_ in said dream.

* * *

Please don't hurt me! yes, yes i know nothing much happened...but sometimes people get bored right? Even if they're stuck in the 'jungle of mystery' as sawyer puts it. I promise something (i find) hilarious happens soon, and i think you guys will be shocked and like "what the?" too. Review please! (and check out other story plz) ;) i am SUCH a review whore LOL!


	12. Chapter 11: I gasp

**Disclaimer:** Do i have to tell you guys again that i don't own lost again? Nothing has changed since about 3 days ago when i posted the last chappie...yes, three days ago, i have no life.

**Author's Note: **OMG i just got a JOB! Working for a company that builds our roads! I can't believe i let my mother guilt me into this. "Don't worry, i'll only be a room away," She says, like that is a GOOD thing! Oh well, so yeah considering i'll be working from 8 in the morning til 5 at night, it might be a LOT longer between chapters. Well, luckily it's only til Dec 22 then i have holidays.

**ZELINIA**: I like the term review whore too, lol. I hear that Desmond will be back on the show...that's all i am saying. I am quite the Desmond fan...if you haven't noticed. I don't really think that he is crazy, just...well i'd like to see how well people acted if'd THEY'D been stuck in a hatch for three yrs with no more than 108 minutes continuous sleep. Thanks for the lovely review!

**Blackcat69**: Thanks for checking out my other story (well moreof a chapter that doesn't fit in anywhere)i really appreciate it. There will be more of them soon-ish.

**baudelaire7**: Thanks, the bickering and sexual innuendo between Morgan and Sawyer is probably my favourite part to write. Desmond may or may not be up to something...i haven't really worked that bit out myself lol.

**phoenix inferno**: Thanks, yeah i think desmond deserves to be seen as a nice-ish guy. I mean, he hasn't really done any thing bad...except hold Locke at gunpoint i suppose. But hey, then jack, shannon, charlie and kate are all 'bad' too. Maybe it's my infatuation for scottish accents, i'm not sure lol.

**Darkblaze666**: Haha, you're not much of a fan of Desmond are ya? I think he is great coz if he and Morgan get closer perhaps Sawyer will get a little Jealous...might be a future plot bunny. Haha yey! i can't believe someone actually wants a made up character to hook up with Sawyer, not Kate or something. Go you!

Just a warning, i have NEVER written something even slightly sexual before, so this actually made me giggle when i was typing this...how immature of me, right? Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter 11**

I gasp.

Someone is touching my arm. I open my eyes and see a figure looming over me. I let out a scream but a hand covers my mouth, muffling the sound. I squint and see a familiar pair of eyes looking at me.

"Shhh! It's me." He uncovers my mouth.

"Sawyer! What are you doing?" I whisper.

He puts his finger to his lips and pulls me up from the ground. He then proceeds to pull me away from our camp. Once we are a safe speaking distance away he stops.

"What're you doing? We can't just…just leave!" I say quietly.

"Why? Why should we wait for him? He's just some guy who captured us, we don't owe him anything," he says bitterly.

"We need to find out where he came from," I insist.

"No! I'll just...you know, shoot him and we can go."

"Sawyer, no!" I can't believe he is being so flippant over killing someone.

"Why not?"

"Because…you can't just, just… _kill_ someone!"

Realization dawns on his face. "Oh I see what it is…you _like_ him."

"What?" I look into his green eyes, and find it strange that he is so clean…he was dirty and bloody mere hours ago.

"You like him. You were all giggly and flirty with him…you do, don't you?"

"What the hell is it to you anyway?" I ask harshly.

"What's it to me? It's disgusting, that's what it is. And I don't want you to act that way around him." He orders, grabbing my shoulders and squeezing hard.

"Excuse me?" I ask in disbelief.

"You heard me." I barely have time to register his words before Sawyer crushes his lips to mine. I gasp in shock and he takes this as an opportunity to slip in his tongue, and after a moment I respond also. When the kiss ends I am breathless, leaning slightly against him. Sawyer bends down and peppers my neck with kisses, and I moan.

"Sawyer…we can't." I protest, whilst undoing his shirt.

He laughs against my neck, his breath sending a thrill through me.

He pulls off his shirt, and I admire his toned bronze chest. His wound is no longer there, but I don't care, all logic has left me by now.

Sawyer pulls my top over my head and continues kissing my neck. My hands skate over his back, and when he bites my neck I gasp and my nails dig into his skin. He reaches behind me and undoes my bra skillfully, letting it fall to the ground. My pulse quickens as he resumes kissing my neck, slowly working his way downwards.

"Morgan," he whispers.

"Oh god," I moan as I shut my eyes.

"Morgan." His voice is firmer now.

"Yes," I say, and I'm not sure if I am answering him or urging him onwards.

"Morgan, get up."

My eyes flutter open and I see Sawyer's smirking face looking down at me.

"Oh god yes what?" He asks, eyebrows raised.

"Excuse me?"

"You were talking in your sleep. You said 'oh god yes' and you were moanin' and stuff. Tell me princess, what exactly were you dreamin' about?" His smirk breaks into a full fledged grin.

"What? Oh, nothing…I can't remember," I lie, trying to hold the blush from creeping to my cheeks.

He laughs. "You were dreamin' about sex, weren't you?"

"No!" I say, a little too quickly.

"Oh my god, you were! Who was the lucky guy?" I must be as red as a tomato, my cheeks are so hot the feel like they're on fire.

"God Sawyer, unlike _you, _my life doesn't revolve around sex."

"You say that as if it's a _bad_ thing." Sawyer puts on a face of mock astonishment. Or maybe he really is astonished?

"Maybe it is."

"Don't avoid my question…who was the guy?"

My eyes land on Desmond, and I frown, he's still here…he actually kept his word.

"_Him_? Him!" Sawyer exclaims, following my eyes.

"Huh?" I ask, puzzled. It takes a while to register. Sawyer thinks I mean Desmond! "Oh…so what?"

"So I can't believe you dreamt about you and him doin' it!"

"You have no idea what I was dreaming about, and besides, I can dream of 'doin it' with whoever I want." I top off the statement by planting my hands on my hips.

He smirks. "You know what? I'm gonna tell him."

"You are _not_."

"Yeah well, not right now, but I will later. My buddy Desmond and I will have a good ol' chat."

I roll my eyes and start packing up my things. I look over to Desmond and see that he is awake. I quickly avert my eyes back to my backpack. What if he had heard and thinks…? Oh well, At least they don't know what I had really dreamt about. Heat rushes to my cheeks again. Damn Sawyer, why the hell does he have that effect on me? He's the most arrogant person I've ever met, plus he's rude, and only cares about himself. I go through all the bad points about Sawyer and try to not think about the dimples he gets when he smirks or how nice he looks under that shirt of his. Oh god, I'm doing it again! Snap out of it!

I growl, disgusted at myself, and throw my backpack to the ground. This catches the attention of both Sawyer and Desmond, who are looking at me curiously.

"What?" I snap. "Well…c'mon, we should get an early start, after all, we probably have a lot of walking to do considering we have no idea _where_ we are or _where _we need to get to."

Desmond stands up and stretches leisurely. "I see you're in a fine mood this mornin'."

"Well how could I not be when in such _wonderful_ company?" I ask sardonically.

"Thankyou," both men say in unison, both with grins on their faces. Oh joy, Sawyer has a new play friend.

A few minutes later, and a tin of beans between us, and we are ready to set off again. I am about to start walking when I realize I don't know _where _we are going.

"Alright boys, where do we go from here?"

"To the camp. I thought we'd already agreed on that."

"No, we shouldn't go to the camp. You should follow me, I'll take you to my place. There's food there and electricity and-"

"You're place? What do you mean 'your place'?" I ask, confusion plastered on my face.

"The place I've been living for the last three years. Don't you wanna know where I came from?"

"Wait a second, you're telling me that you've been _living_ here…for three years?" I ask dumbfounded.

"Yeah. I thought the Doctor or box man would've told you."

I look to Sawyer. He seems as confused and astounded as I am.

"Wait, you've met the doc? Jackass?"

"Jack, yeah, that's his name."

"Wait, who is jack? And who is box man? And how the hell have you been living here for three years? And how…how, oh god I need a drink." I put a hand to my head, feeling a headache coming on.

"How the hell do you know Jack?" Sawyer demands.

"I met him once, before I got stuck here. Then yesterday, he comes barging in and asking all these questions…the computer, the button needs to be pushed every 108 minutes, and he didn't believe me, and the computer broke. So I left, and he followed me. That's the last I saw of him."

"Okay, so you weren't on the plane?" I ask, trying to understand all of this.

"No."

"And you've been here for three years?" Sawyer asks skeptically.

"Yeah." Desmond looks at us both with his dark eyes, as if we are the crazy ones.

I shiver.

Who is this guy?

* * *

Wow, sorry about the crappy ending. Desmond sounds a bit iffy again, doesn't he? LOL so...how many of you thought Morgan and Sawyer were gonna...'get it on'? Haha, i was tempted to make them,TRUST ME! REVIEW PRETTY PLEASE: P 


	13. Chapter 12: I sit

**Disclaimer:** No.

**Author's Note:** Yeah well i have started work now and i am literally exhausted by the time i get home, so there might be much longer delays, as creativity is nearly impossible when running on empty. Yeah so this chapter is crap and i did it in 2 hours because i said i would post it by yesterday, oops. Most likely will be edited later to delete crappiness. LOL! wow, i need to go to bed now, early morning tomorrow. Review please!

**Chapter Twelve**

I sit.

"Wait…so you're telling us that…that you've been living here, on this island, in some kind of…house, for the last few years?" I ask slowly, still not believing what I have just heard.

Desmond sighs, irritation clear on his face. "Yes," he states simply.

"Are you one of them?" Sawyer asks, now holding a stick menacingly.

"One of who exactly?" Desmond asks, stepping up to sawyer.

Sawyer puffs out his chest, as if to challenge him. "One of the others, you know, those damn people that burnt our raft, killed Scott…or was it Steve? Oh and they stole a pregnant chick."

Desmond rounds on Sawyer. "Are you accusing me of killin' someone? Because I don't-"

"Maybe I am."

I get up off the ground and squeeze myself between the two men, and push Sawyer away. "Stop it! Both of you are acting like children! Now, we need to work this out, not bloody kill each other! Sawyer, you intentionally try to aggravate people and it's so childish!" Sawyer glares at me.

"Of course you yell at _me_, coz you bloody love _that _guy-" he says, pointing to Desmond.

"Sawyer, shut up!"

I then turn to Desmond. "And you! You need to calm down. All we are doing is trying to understand the situation, there's no need to get so touchy. You should _both_ be ashamed of yourselves!"

I calm myself down and look at the both of them. Both are staring at me with a mix of shock and wonder.

For a while there is silence and all that can be heard is my heavy breathing and a bird calling somewhere far away.

"Wow, that sounds so much like my mum," Desmond states and instantly both men break out laughing.

"Well I am glad that Sawyer has finally found someone with the same amount of intelligence as him."

"I know, who'd a thunk it? I didn't expect there to be two geniuses on this damn island," Sawyer remarks arrogantly.

"I'm glad you two are friends now, but can you one of you masterminds please explain to those of us with lesser intelligence what is going on here?"

"Nothing is going on Morgan, I've told you everything," Desmond says, and the fact that he used my name makes me feel awkward, like we are friends, when all we are is complete strangers who stumbled upon each other in the evil jungle.

"Now that's funny, because it seems that there is _always_ something going on in this damn place," I say sharply.

"Look, I'll explain it for you again," Desmond says in a patronizing tone, as he lowers me to sit back on the ground.

"Don't you treat me like a child, just because I don't understand your crazy _lies_." I snap at him as I push his hands away.

Sawyer laughs. "Oh thank _god_ she's over hitting me."

I glare at him. "I don't understand you _boys_, one second you are about to beat each other into a pulp, the next you're both laughing and joking at my expense."

Sawyer and Desmond both pause and look at each other, Desmond's eyes flashing with something akin to suspicion and Sawyer with a raised eyebrow and his trademark smirk.

Desmond speaks first. "We're not laughing _at_ you Morgan, we're laughing with you," he says, in such a Sawyer-ish way that even I reluctantly smile. "No, but honestly, I've told you everything. I was on a race around the world, I get stuck here, this guy Kelvin finds me and he takes me to this…magnetic station. This place is like an underground house, I mean, it's got everything. There's this timer, and every 108 minutes, you have to push the execute button, or else something bad happens and we all die." At my skeptical look he continues. "Well, that's what I was told, anyway. Well yesterday this guy Jack, who you're buddy Sawyer seems to know, comes in looking for the bald guy and the girl, with a gun. So I'm telling him to put the bloody gun down and all of a sudden I'm knocked over the damn head and my gun goes off; Right into the computer. Well, I tried to fix it and I couldn't, so I packed some stuff and left."

"You just left?" I ask, surprised. Desmond turns and looks at me

"I wasn't waiting around to see what happens when the timer reached zero. Well, either they got the computer working again or something _did_ happen, because that was over a day ago."

"Well here's an idea, you think maybe the timer counts down to nothing and your pal Kevin was just a little bit loco?" Asks Sawyer.

"You think I pushed a button _every single_ hundred and eight minutes, for the last _three years _because a nutter felt like makin' up a story?"

"Hell yes."

"Well you can believe it, but I don't."

"I don't just think that this friend of yours was nuts, I'd bet your not so sane yourself, Scottie." Desmond starts to get up off the ground again but I am up quicker.

"Oh please just stop! Okay, to see if Desmond here is telling the truth, we should go to his little house and check it out. That's the only way we are going to find out whether or not he is lying to us." I look at both 'men', though they hardly deserve the title. "Sound fair?" I ask half mockingly, half seriously.

"I don't appreciate being talked to like a kid," Sawyer says.

"Start acting like an adult and I'll start treating you like one."

"My god, you are my mother, aren't you?" Desmond asks with a grin. I grimace, trying to imagine what his mother must look like but am left with an image of Desmond in a dress, the thought almost makes me explode with laughter, but I manage to keep it in. Just.

"Oh trust me, if she was your mother, the dreams she has would be called incestual," Sawyer says, a smirk playing on his lips.

My head snaps in his direction, eyes wide in a mix of fury and embarrassment and my mouth agape.

Desmond looks to me with his brow furrowed. "Sorry? What's he on about?"

"I…oh…he's…nothing…he's just an idiot," I stutter, lowering my head to hide the blush that has exploded onto my face.

"Oh nothing, is it? 'Oh god yes' is nothing? I believe that's an exact quote too," he says whilst smiling like a Cheshire cat.

"Oh my god you are such an _ass_, Sawyer," I say, glaring at him. I put my backpack on. "C'mon, we should start moving."

Desmond and Sawyer both put their bags on. "I _told_ you I'd have a chat with him," he says with a triumphant look on his face.

Desmond looks puzzled, as he has for about the last minute or so. "What?..."

"Nothing… really it's nothing," I say, pushing him in front of me as I glare behind at Sawyer.

"Oh that's Morgan for ya, likes to wear the pants in the relationship."

I stop abruptly and turn around. It's no surprise to me to see sawyer grinning like an imbecile. I walk up to him and stand up on my toes. "It wasn't Desmond in my dream, Okay?" I whisper, and give him an affectionate little slap on the face. It pleases me to see Sawyer speechless for once. I continue following Desmond through the jungle in silence.

I blush.

If only Sawyer knew the _half_ of it.

* * *

**A/N:** Review Please! thankyou to all of my reviewers, i hope you got the private messages! Get excited for me! Lost comes out on dvd tomorrow in Australia! w00t w00t! 


	14. Chapter 13: I groan

**Author's Note:** Sorry for the delay, work has been busy and i am so tired when i get home from trying to look like i am working lol. Umm...so yeah this chapter is just more conversation stuff mainly, oh and SOMEONE NEW oh and SAWYER NAKED! so yeah, all in all, i like it. Review please :P oh i hope everyone got their review reply thingies, oh and thankyou all so much, you lovely, lovely people.

**Chapter 13**

I frown. 

We have been trudging through the jungle for almost an hour in complete silence. It unnerves me a little, because Sawyer is never quiet. Even in his sleep the man makes noise. I look behind me to check if he is even there, and I am surprised to see that he is glaring again. The man is as temperamental as a pregnant woman sometimes.

I turn back and see that Desmond is quite a bit ahead now so I jog a little to catch up. He looks at me with a raised eyebrow. "So?"

"So…" I shrug.

"So you and your boyfriend are havin' a bit of a tiff are ya?" he asks with a slight smile.

"Sawyer _isn't_ my boyfriend. He's not even my friend! He's just some guy who I almost killed three days ago because I thought he was some…monster or something." I explain as if it is completely logical.

"Oh…right. Well, why are ya fighting?" he inquires.

"We're not fighting. I just don't want to talk to him right now."

Desmond laughs. "So you're fighting then. God, why do women do that? 'we're not fighting, I'm just locking him out of the house and getting a divorce.' I say you're all nutters."

I raise an eyebrow. "Are you done? I think I might go talk to Sawyer after all." I make to turn around but Desmond grabs my shoulder.

"Hold on, I was just jokin'. I won't insult your gender anymore," He says with a sigh. "Besides…I've been alone for quite a while, and the toaster is a great listener, but not too good at conversation."

I laugh. "The kettle on the other hand..."

"Oh yeah, the kettle never shuts up, I can hardly get a word in," he says with a stern look on his face. We both laugh.

"So you really have all that stuff…a kettle and toaster and…"

"Yeah, and my favourite, the record player."

I stop in my tracks. "Wait…what did you say? You have…music?"

Desmond looks at me strangely. "Errr…yeah. Some of it's really bad, but there are some good records there. There's also a bunk bed and a whole store room of food."

My eyes are almost bulging out of their sockets. "Music…bed…food. It must be heaven." I sigh.

Desmond laughs at me. "You're a strange one…but you're better to talk to than the doctor, he's a real…well, asshole to be frank."

I furrow my brow. "I've never met the doctor, or anyone. You see, I've been on this island alone for the last few weeks until I found Sawyer three days ago. So I am even more confused than the both of you."

"Really? How did you end up away from all the others? The rest of the survivors."

I hesitate to reply. "I…I don't know. I've been trying to work that out myself. I just thought that they'd seen us lying on the beach and assumed we were dead, then packed up and headed off somewhere."

Desmond looks at me with a puzzled expression. "Us? You said 'us'."

"Oh…yeah. My friend…she, she didn't –actually, I don't really wanna talk about it." I lower my head to hide the sadness that I know is showing on my face.

"Right, sorry."

We continue to walk in uncomfortable silence for a while until I hear a noise.

"Do you hear that?" I ask Desmond.

"What?"

"That noise, that…hissing noise." I look around to try and find where the noise is coming from. If it is a snake then screw the record player, I am running like the wind.

"That's not hissing, that's water," Sawyer says, walking right past us.

"Water...how do you know?" I ask, trying to keep up with him.

"What? Oh _now_ you'll talk to me?" he asks, glaring at me.

"Sawyer, please-"

"Oh don't mind me, I'm just some guy you almost killed…that's all."

"Well…what were you expecting? We aren't friends. We can barely stand each other, we don't trust each other and we argue a majority of the time. The only reason we are together is because we both want to stay alive, isn't it?"

Sawyer looks long and hard at me and there is _something_ in his eyes that I cannot quite name. "Yeah…you're right."

He starts moving again and I follow with Desmond behind, a mere minute later he stops and I almost bump into him.

"Sawyer can you-" I stop abruptly when I see why he has stopped.

"Holy shite," Desmond says behind me, followed by a low whistle.

Sawyer was right, it was water. I am standing on the edge of what looks like a lagoon of sorts. There is a little cliff on the opposite side that has created a little waterfall. It really is quite beautiful, even if it is in the middle of this scary place.

"Oh my god water! Good one Sawyer, I didn't know you could…do that."

"Do what?" he asks defensively, ready for an argument.

"Be useful…but I see that I'm wrong."

"Well at least-wait...did you just say I was useful?" he asks with a smirk.

I roll my eyes "Make note of that Sawyer, I'm not saying it again."

He turns to Desmond "You hear that Scottie, she just said I was useful. That's about the only compliment I've ever heard her say." Desmond looks like he really doesn't care, and just looks at Sawyer quizzically.

"Is the water…safe? As in not full of man eating eels, cause I could really do with a bath."I say, looking at myself, dirt covering me with the odd patch of blood soaking my clothes.

"Well there's one way to find out girly, hows about you go take a bath while we watch from over here, then if an eel comes, we can come to your rescue," Sawyer says mischievously.

"Oh that's so sweet, you truly are a knight in shining armour, so noble and brave…and a pervert," I say sarcastically.

"Don't worry, I can't see anything, if you don't go too deep it should be alright," Desmond says. I smile at him "Thank you, it's nice to see _some_ people can act maturely when needed." I look pointedly at Sawyer, who glares in return.

"Alright, you guys just…relax a bit back there while I get clean. When I'm done its all yours." I indicate behind an area that is thickly covered in shrubbery for them to wait, so that they don't see anything I don't want them to see.

"Aww, you're no fun." Sawyer says petulantly.

"Go!" I shoo the men away and wait a moment to make sure they are gone, once I hear quiet conversation coming from the shrubby area I start to undress. I keep my bra and undies on just in case, after all, it _is_ Sawyer. I step into the water and relish in the soothing coolness of it. I step further out until I am submerged in water from my shoulders. I can practically feel the dirt and sweat and blood washing off me, and sink under the water to 'wash' my hair.

When I surface I hardly have enough time to register the figure to my right running towards me and cannon-balling into the water. I squeal and swim for the opposite direction, and to my pack which has the knife in it. I am halfway there when I sneak a look behind me and see a familiar face surface the water, and flick his long wet hair out of his face.

"Sawyer! What're you doing? I thought I said-"

"I heard a noise, thought I should check it out."

"By canon-balling into the water? Very subtle, you're quite the master of stealth," I say mockingly.

"Just making sure you weren't attacked by any snakes in the water, well, any snakes that you don't wanna be attacked by." He says, lerring at me, and I look down to realize I am now only waste deep in water, and wearing a rather semi-transparent bra. I gasp and cross my arms over my chest. "I'm warning you Sawyer, if your snake goes anywhere near me I'll rip it off with my bare hands."

He takes a step closer. "Ah but see, that would mean you'd have to uncross your arms…besides, I was just going to tell you about the little chat I had with my pal Desmond."

"Oh really?" I ask doubtfully.

"Yeah. So, we're talking, and I didn't really notice it at first, but he keeps looking away at something, then I come up to see what he's looking at…It was you." He finally has the decency to look me in the eyes.

"What?"

"He keeps looking at you while you swim around without a clue, and I say that you're not bad looking, and he went all 'I dunno what you're talking about', so anyway, later on he tells me about how he hasn't seen a woman for 3 years, and then I kinda feel sorry for the guy. So I accidently let it slip about you're little dream." The last sentence is said very quickly, so it takes me a moment to register.

"You _what_!"

"I'm sorry, but it's kinda good , I mean, he has a thing for you, and you obviously have a thing for him-"

"I do not have a thing for him!" I yell.

"Well...I've seen the way you look at him, you like him. You're always laughing and flirting with him, it's disgusting really."

Something in my mind clicks. "oh wow, déjà vu there."

"Huh?"

"Déjà vu, you said that in my…oh, nothing."

"I never said that before…unless…" realization dawns on his face and I lower my head to hide the embarrassment.

"I was in your dream too, with you and…and him? What was I doing there?"

My head snaps up."Oh just being an idiot, really," My god, he is really daft sometimes, praise the lord. I try and change the subject. "Is that all you came to do? Try and freak me out and make false accusations just because _you're_ a pervert."

"Oh it must be one of those dreams where everything is backwards, if I was being an idiot." He says, and I notice that Sawyer doesn't seem to be wearing any clothing.

"Sawyer, are you naked!" I ask, astonished.

"Maybe, maybe not." He turns and walks away, and slowly the water level lowers and I see that he certainly is _not_ wearing any clothes, if his exposed bum is any indication.

"Oh my god! Give a girl a warning would you?" I say as I avert my eyes.

"Well just so you know, I have no problem with you running around naked without a warning. In fact, I encourage it." I turn and thankfully Sawyer has put his pants on. He shakes his head like a dog does, and doesn't even bother to put his shirt on, just saunters off with a smirk. I must admit, he does have a rather nice bottom.

I wait a moment to get out of the water, and realize that I forgot to get a towel.

"Dammit!" I huff and pull out a t-shirt, as I am bending down to put on my jeans I hear a rustle of leaves. Something emerges from the bushes.

I shriek.

"Dude!" a voice that isn't Sawyer _or_ Desmond says.

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A/N: Yeah i know i said it before, but please review, it makes me wanna write more quicker...i'm not sure if that is a good thing though lol. Oh yey im nearly up to 100! thanks so much! 


	15. Chapter 14: I scream

**A/N:** Okay, so i lied, i said i'd update really soon but work is hard yada yada yada...you get the picture. Sorry about the delay, i had a major case of 'i can't be stuffed writing anything' disorder, but i got a nice dose of medication by watching my season one lost dvd! So yeah, and thanks to **phoenix inferno** for posting my 100th review! hoorah, lets all have a party (gets karaoke machine out) who's up for a little ABBA, maybe a little Bon Jovi? ahahahaha!

Sawyer: I'll sing...

Me: Okay...oh one more thing, did i mention it was STRIP karaoke? (evil grin)

Sawyer: Nope, but i'm up for that (nakedness ensues)

Me: (Drool) sjasdfgkdjmwdoigjwrogjflala w00tw00t!

ahem, on with the show...

**

* * *

Chapter Fourteen **

I scream.

"Whoa whoa whoa. Calm down!"

"Help!" I scream, my wide eyes never leaving the large man.

"Dude, its okay, I'm not going to hurt you!"

"Go away!" I start to back away whilst covering myself with my pile of clothes.

"Morgan?" someone says from the trees.

"Help me!" I spare a look in the direction the voice had come from.

"Dude." The large man is looking past me, and I see that Sawyer and Desmond have emerged from the bushes.

"Lardo!"

"Sawyer?" The big man asks dumbfounded.

"Sawyer!" I exclaim frantically.

"What the?" Desmond asks, obviously as confused as I am.

"Dude," the fat man repeats.

Silence follows and it takes me a moment to get over my confusion and realize all three men are looking at me, the big guy is blushing profusely. I then remember that I am only partially clothed. "Oh my god turn around you bunch of perverts!" I yelp, blushing from my head to my toes.

They all turn around and I see Sawyer turn slightly to try and get a look numerous times. I can hear the fat man whispering with Sawyer something about a raft and 'the others'. I clear my throat to indicate that I'm done and the men turn around again.

"So, before I pass out or something can I please be informed of who the hell this guy is and why you know him, Sawyer?" I blurt quickly, looking suspiciously at Sawyer.

"I'm Hurley, I was on the plane crash with Sawyer, and can you please not speak to me like I'm not here? Besides, I'd like to know who you two are," he says, looking at Desmond and I.

"A friend of Sawyer's, how lovely," I say sarcastically, "I'm Morgan." I offer my hand and the man, Hurley, looks at it suspiciously before shaking it. He then turns to Desmond who also sticks out his hand, a slight grin on his face. Hurley doesn't shake it, he simply stares at Desmond, well, Desmond's jumpsuit for a long moment before letting out a long "Dude."

Desmond looks as confused as Sawyer and I. "What? Oh the symbol…do you know it from somewhere?" he asks, that strange glint arising in his eyes again.

"Yeah, you could say that I guess," Hurley states, never taking his eyes from the symbol. I wonder why he's looking at it so strangely?

"Well that's great, now Hurley, has anyone found Mike or Jin? Are they, you know, alive?" Sawyer asks.

"What? No, no I thought they would'a been with you…are you saying they're still out there? Dude…that sucks."

Both men are quiet for a moment until Sawyer snaps out of whatever thoughts he was having. "Well we gotta go back to camp then. Tell the others, we can set up some groups and go search for them."

"Okay, well…we're only about an hour away from the caves, so if we leave now we can get there before it starts to get dark. But we can't go looking for them today, its too late," Hurley says somberly.

"Fine, lets just get back," Sawyer says impatiently.

"So we're not goin' back to…my place then?" Desmond asks.

"Well, we don't need to know do we sctottie? We know where we're going now."

"But I have medical supplies, and…and food, and-"

"Why're you so eager for us to get there, huh? You wanna go all 'Ethan' on us when we get there and eat us or something?" Sawyer says right in Desmond's face.

Desmond pushes Sawyer away from him. "I'm sorry; I thought that you might-"

I interrupt before anything drastic happens and round on Sawyer. "Stop it! My god Sawyer, you truly are a total bastard, aren't you? The guy's only trying to help and all you do is-"

"That's it, defend him! He only held us captive and put a gun to our heads!" Sawyer yells, waving his arms about.

"You're not one to talk Sawyer, if you recall-"

"Quiet!" Hurley yells, but I continue.

"- you also had a gun pointed at somebody!"

"It was a joke, god dammit!"

"QUIET!" Hurley yells, louder this time.

I stop and try to calm myself down, blushing slightly in embarrassment. Sawyer is still glaring daggers at Desmond and I. He's right, Desmond did hold us at gunpoint, and tie us up, but the truth is I did practically the same thing to Sawyer mere days before. Perhaps this is why I find myself constantly sticking up for Desmond, because I am defending myself also.

"Now, we gotta stop fighting, we don't have time! I'd really like to make it back by dinner time, if that's alright. So let's just go." Hurley snaps, well more a whine really, and we walk in silence for the next half hour or so.

"Hello." I look up to see Desmond looking at me, a grin on his face. Is the guy always happy?

"Hi." I say rather dispassionately.

"Umm, thanks for doing that…defending me. Oh and for stopping me doing something I might regret. It's just that Sawyer guy…he's a real twat." He says, scowling briefly when mentioning Sawyer.

I laugh."Yeah he is most of the time, but…not always. He has had a bad couple of days lately."

He frowns at me. "I really don't get you. One second you're defending me, the next you're defending him."

"Well…it's a hard job but someone has to do it." I smile tightly, not wanting another argument.

"No, they don't. But…thank you nonetheless." He is grinning again and I'm relieved that I won't have to argue again.

"You're very much welcome."

For a while we walk in awkward silence, many times Desmond would open his mouth as if to say something but close it again. Eventually he talks.

"So, we're goin' to this…camp of you're friends, and then what? We just…wait for somethin' to kill us all off, do we?" Desmond asks skeptically.

I look at him in surprise. "That's a very negative attitude, maybe we'll wait for someone to come and rescue us. Who knows what could happen?"

"Rescue you? You can't honestly believe that somebody is goin' to come if they haven't already," he says in a patronizing tone, "I'm not a negative kind of person, but I am realistic."

"Okay, so what's you're bright idea then? If you think the camp is such a bad idea, then what's the alternative?" I snap.

"Well we could go to the bunker, as I've said a million times. I mean, look at you, you look terrible, you need to rest." His dark eyes lock on mine after looking me up and down critically.

"Oh thanks a bunch," I say whilst rolling my eyes.

"Well it's true. If you go to this 'camp' of Sawyer's they're gonna want answers, they're gonna wanna know every little detail since you've been here. Then you'll go off on some rescue mission for two men that might not even be on this bloody island. And then perhaps they'll interrogate you some more. Buy 'them' I really mean Jack." The last part is added as an afterthought, and I start to think that maybe Desmond doesn't like this Jack guy very much.

"That's true, but do you even know where you're bunker is?"

"Dude, did you say bunker?" Hurley says, suddenly interested in our conversation.

"Yeah, Desmond here has been living in it." I say, not really understanding it myself.

"Dude, so you're the guy! The one who was pressing that button on the computer, I thought you were like…dead."

"Well, as you can see I'm very much alive. How do you know about it anyway?" Desmond asks Hurley with a stunned expression.

"Well…I went along to blow up the hatch door, and then Kate ran up saying that something had happened and we had to get Sayid to fix the computer, and I came along." Sawyer's head snaps up at the mention of this 'Kate' girl, but he doesn't say anything.

"So you fixed the computer? Good, so who's pressing the button then?"

"Oh, well people were taking shifts."

"Right, so there's a bunch of people in there then?" Desmond asks, not sounding thrilled about that.

"Well, two at a time I think," says Hurley, not sounding too sure about it.

"Okay, so how exactly do I get there from here?"

"You just go down the path; you can't miss it, dude I thought you said you lived there?"

"Lived _in_ it, I didn't exactly get out much," Desmond says dryly.

"Okay well I don't understand a thing you two just said, but it seems we're at a fork in the road."

"And how's that?" Sawyer asks, speaking up finally.

"Well Desmond is pretty set on going back to the hatch, and I think I'll go with him."

"My god, you're joking right?" Sawyer looks at me as if I have just grown an extra head.

"Why would I be joking? I'd rather be under a roof with a bed and a shower than camping in a cave with a bunch of strangers."

"I'm not a stranger," he says, and then his eyes grow wide as if he hadn't meant to say it aloud. I stare at him for a moment, trying to figure out what he means by it.

"For all we know-look, come here, I need to talk to you alone," he says grabbing my arm and glaring at Desmond. He stomps off, dragging me behind.

Sawyer rounds on me and whispers angrily, "For all we know he could be a psychopath trying to kidnap you or…well the guy said so himself, he hasn't been around a woman in over three years-"

"Sawyer! I can't believe you just implied that he is going to…he's not going to rape me, that's ridiculous!" I hiss, wrenching my arm out of his grip.

"Don't be so sure. Well I'm goin to the caves, and you should go too, we have a doctor and…" Sawyer hesitates.

"And? I can look after myself well enough, Sawyer. You at least should know that."

"Well fine, stay with the freaky Scottish guy, but don't say I didn't warn you."

"It's sweet that you care so much, Sawyer," I say wryly.

"I just don't wanna have to comfort you if something goes wrong."

I don't know why it surprises me that he'd say something as insensitive as that, but I don't buy it. "Alright, well goodbye Sawyer."

"Yeah, see ya round…and Morgan, look after yourself."

I give a small smile and walk away. "You too, get that arm fixed up properly."

Sawyer snickers. "Hopefully Jack has better equipment than sanitary products to fix it with."

I grin.

I might even miss Sawyer a little bit.

* * *

A/N: okay, well nothing really happened, oh except Morgan is going off to the HATCH with DESMOND and SAWYER is no longer around. (sigh) it was very hard to make him leave. Anyway, REVIEW PLEASE, yes,even though it was another crappy chappie (haha that rhymes)oh and hurley will be funnier when it is the right occasion, i promise. Ohand THANKS TO EVERYONE WHO HAS REVIEWED SO FAR! 

Sawyer: "Mamamia, here i go again, my my, how could i resist it? Mamamia, does it show again, my my..."

Me: BOO HISS BOO! I am burning you're clothes as punishment for your terrible singing, muahahaha!(evil grin)


	16. Chapter 15: I yawn

**Disclaimer: Still don't own lost, but i DO own the dvd so ner ner ne ner ner.**

**Author's Note: Hides SorrySorrySorrySorrySorrySorrySorrySorrySorry...Sorry. Work is really tiring blah blah blah, i lost my groove for a bit and got into a writing phunk and it was terrible and desolate and i hope it never happens again. Once again i'm not fond of this chapter, and one must wonder if i'm fond of this story at all, but i promise something WILL happen eventually. It's kinda like the actual show in that respect hehe. Because it was such a long delay i shall have the next chapter (which was actually just the second part of THIS chapter, but happened to be too long) up by Sunday. Thanks to all who review, and please keep doing it even though i have tarnished your honour...wow it is late and i am talking CRAP.**

**Chapter Fifteen**

I yawn.

Desmond and I have been walking now for a good hour, and the sun has now vanished from my sight, leaving the jungle dark and the air cool.

"Are you sure we're going the right way? The guy said we'd be there soon, and that was at least an hour ago."

"Yes, I'm sure, I know what direction to go in," Desmond says uncertainly.

"Men and their inability to admit they're lost," I say whilst rolling my eyes.

Desmond turns to face me. "Excuse me, but I've been here a little longer than you have." He then proceeds to walk through the darkened jungle.

"Yes. In a bunker under the ground, now if we could_ find_ said bunker, that'd be great," I say, yelling a little as I catch up with him.

Desmond sighs. "Just please shut it, I know where we're goin'." Sure you do, we're just taking the 'scenic route.'

"You're regretting that I came with you, aren't you?" I ask with a grin.

"You're bloody right I am," he says in a stern voice, but I notice that he is smiling.

"Well too bad, you're stuck with me until at least tomorrow morning."

"Holy Jesus, that long eh?"

"That's blasphemy," I scold, crossing my arms.

"So you're religious then?" Desmond asks, quirking an eyebrow.

"Well, my Nan, she's Irish-" I shrug, as if that explains it.

Desmond nods. "Oh alright, enough said."

We walk in silence for a while and I start having second thoughts. Maybe I can catch up with Sawyer? No I can't, besides that'd leave Desmond alone and I am very interested in this hatch thing of his. Besides, he's a nice guy and I'm sure sawyer was just overreacting. My thoughts are interrupted by the sight of a giant metal door slightly covered in gnarled roots and vines no more than a few feet away from me. "Oh my god…" I stop and stare at the door, mouth agape in disbelief.

"Hey, that's blasphemy," Desmond says chidingly, then as if a giant door in the middle of the jungle is completely normal, grins smugly. "See, I told you I'd find it. And you doubted me."

"Well, I suppose I'm sorry," I say in a nonchalant voice, unwilling to admit that he was right.

"You suppose, do you? Well I suppose I might just not let you in," he says with the usual twist of mouth, mischief glimmering in his eyes.

I plant my hands on my hips. "Desmond, that's not even funny. Just get in please, it's getting dark and i…"

The mischief in his eyes turns to suspicion. "Are you scared of the dark?" The memory comes crashing into my consciousness before I can will it away.

"_Morgan, are you still afraid of the dark?"_

"_No, not anymore…I haven't been scared of the dark for a long time."_

"_I think you still are. Don't worry, I'll stay in your bed until you're asleep."_

"_No, it's alright. I'm not scared, please, just leave me alone…"_

"_Shut up you little…it's okay Morgan, I'll just stay a little while."_

"_No, no no…"_

"Morgan?" Desmond's voice makes me suddenly aware of the present, and I shiver, thinking how close I came to reliving that nightmare. It's no good dwelling on the past, people say, as if there is any choice in the matter.

"No, don't be ridiculous," I scoff.

Suddenly he is serious. "You are, aren't yeh?"

I cross my arms over my chest and try my best to put on an intimidating stance. "No, I'm scared of what I might do to you if you don't let me in."

Desmond puts his arms up in defeat. "Okay okay, I'll let you in!"

He pushes and fiddles with the door for a few moments, and something comes to my attention. "Where's the handle?"

"There isn't one," Desmond states matter-of-factly, never taking his eyes off the 'door'.

My brows draw together in confusion. "Well…how do you suppose we get in?"

"'Well how do you suppose'…I'll get us in, okay?" Desmond is obviously starting to get aggravated, so I decide it's better to ignore his evident mocking of me and leave it for another time. Desmond continues to push and hit the large metal door for a while before giving up.

"Okay, change of plan." He says breathlessly, yet determined, and slings his backpack over one shoulder.

"What?" I ask, completely dumbfounded. We just find the bloody thing and now we're off again!

"Follow me." He doesn't even look behind to check that I am there. Probably expects me to just obey like some dog. Men.

I run to catch up with him, as graceful as a baby elephant. "Where are we going? I thought you said you'd found it?"

"I _have_ found it. It's just a matter of getting in the actual place."

I slow down once I reach his side. "And how do you suppose we do that?" I ask cynically.

Desmond finally stops and looks at me. "Well…the back door of course."

I scoff. "Oh of course, how _stupid_ of me," I say whilst rolling my eyes dramatically.

Desmond grins and pats me on the shoulder. "Oh don't be too hard on yourself."

I growl.

Desmond is more like Sawyer than i thought...

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PLEASE REVIEW as it makes the little leprechaun in my head sing and dance and be merry... 


	17. Chapter 16: I glare

**Disclaimer:** I gotta hurry and get ready for work, so do you really think i'd be working as a filing wench if i owned lost?

**Author's note**: Must hurry, must hurry. I promised i'd get it up and i HAVE! The last 500 words or so were very rushed so be kind pleeeaase :). Hmm, i wonder how you people shall react to this chapter, and now you know why i had to break it up into two parts or it might just have been as long as the bible. Must thanks my friend and beta for this chapter The Silent She-Wolf and also i must thank Steam rolled harry potter because amy has also helped me when i'm like "gaaaaaah! wtf!" lol so thanks a bunch guys!. Also thanks for all the reviews! feel free to leave amny, many more:)

**Chapter Sixteen**

I huff.

"You're a real…"

"-charmer?" Desmond adds quickly, and incorrectly.

"I was thinking something more along the lines of idiot."

Desmond puts on an anguished face and puts on a show of being stabbed in the chest. "Aw, now that hurts, that cuts deep."

I roll me eyes and try to hide the slight upturning of my lips. Desmond is much funnier than I had thought on our first encounter. There is something about his biting comments and sarcastic humour that seems so familiar even though I barely know the guy. Heat comes to my cheeks as I realize why Desmond seems so familiar, because his personality has a striking resemblance to a certain drawling southerner. I hope he's alright. He said something about a doctor looking at his wound so it should be fine. _Please_ let it be fine. My evident concern for his wellbeing surprises me, and I force myself to block all thoughts of Sawyer out of my mind. "Well…lead on Indiana Jones, we don't have all night."

"Why, you got somewhere else to be, do yeh?" Desmond asks sardonically.

"Maybe," I say, raising my head haughtily. Desmond simply looks at me like I'm a three year old and continues on his merry way, no doubt getting us ever more lost in the middle of this hell hole.

Desmond pace slows down as he starts looking around for…something. "Well we should almost be there…aha! See that light, I bet you…an Apollo bar that that's where the back door is." He is pointing off to the distance where I can see a small flickering light. Okay so he was right after all.

"What's an Apollo bar?" I ask, not familiar with whatever an 'apollo bar' is.

"Chocolate," Desmond says, dragging the word out and waiting for my reaction.

My eyes widen and I lick my lips at the very sound of the word. "Mmmm. But I…I don't have anything to bet," I say sorrowfully.

"Well, the pleasure of your company is prize enough for me," Desmond says with a small smile.

I know he is joking, but I still can't stop the blush rising to me cheeks. "Oh shut up, you idiot," I say with none of the venom that I would usually spike my insults with.

Desmond's smile falters, his Adams apple rising and falling considerably as he swallows. "No, no…I-I mean it."

It was said with such earnestness that I do a double-take. "Oh…okay," I say breathlessly as I feel my face grow even hotter than it was previously.

"Umm…well we-"

I finally build up the courage to drag my eyes off the ground and look into his. "Thank you," I say, smiling slightly.

Desmond looks pleasantly surprised. "You're welcome," he says and adds quietly, "You're pretty as well."

I turn my eyes away and smile shyly thinking that it was impossible for me to blush any more. Right now I feel a rather vibrant crimson. "And you're blind…or drunk, maybe even both."

"I assure you that I am neither, not yet anyway."

My attempts to rebuke his statement are obviously failing, so I try to change the topic. "Well…you're…not bad either I suppose."

Desmond laughs and shakes his head. "You're terrible at compliments."

Now my blush is out of the unpleasant sort of embarrassment that you feel when you know you are in the wrong. Of course it doesn't mean that I'll _admit_ It. "I'm sorry, but this is quite an awkward situation for me. I mean, I barely know you, and one second we're joking and the next you blurt out…_that_!"

I see a flicker of hurt on his face before it is replaced with irritation. "Well I was under the impression that you were-" he sighs, not finishing his sentence, "But I see I was wrong."

Now I feel terrible, and there is another mark on the chart of times I should've kept my fat mouth shut. "No…sorry, it's not that. I just-I'm really bad at this whole thing…guys and flirting and compliments. I'm flattered, I really am. You're a nice guy when you're not injecting me with strange medicines and tying me to unconscious men," I say smiling, hoping to get a smile in return.

Desmond smiles rather reluctantly. "I can't say I'm proud of those things, and I'm sorry about that, it was all a bit of a misunderstanding…But anyway, do we have a deal?"

I'm glad for the change of topic, perhaps my face can go back to its normal colour now. "…Sure."

Desmond sticks out his hand, and I do in return. It shocks me when instead of shaking it, he raises it to his lips and _kisses_ it. I feel the stubble of his face tickle the back of my hand and try desperately not to giggle. I'm now blushing to the very tips of my toes. "What happened to the old fashioned hand shake?"

Desmond is now the one to look shy, but only for a moment. "Sorry, I was trying to be roguish and charismatic," he explains, and I can't help but laugh. Desmond now looks slightly affronted again.

I can't stop laughing at the comical look on his face, and I realize that I am actually _happy_. I link my arm in his and we continue walking towards the flickering light. "Well c'mon my charming friend; let's see who wins this bet."

As we approach the light my smile falters as an uneasy feeling settles in the pit of my stomach. I would've tripped over something on the ground if not for the arm linked with Desmond's. I stop to take a look at the large object. I squint and try to read the word on what appears to be a massive piece of metal. A tiny gasp escapes my lips as I read the word 'quarantine' printed in red letters. Desmond doesn't notice and pulls me by the hand, obviously eager to get inside this 'hatch' of his. "Desmond…are you sure it's okay to go down there, it says quarantine on that metal thing," I say uneasily.

"Morgan, that was on the _inside_ of the hatch," Desmond says, and it takes me a while to understand; If it says quarantine on the inside, it was saying it's dangerous on the _outside_. I involuntarily shiver at the implications of his words. Only then do I notice that we have stopped and that Desmond is crouching over a large square hole in the ground. I slowly edge closer and I squint my eyes as I look down into infinite darkness. "Holy…crap, what _is_ that?"

Desmond doesn't seem fazed at all. "Oh…right, so that's what it looks like from the other end then," he says lightly.

My eyes are slowly readjusting and I can make out a ladder that is broken off a few meters down, a lot of bloody good that will do us. "Desmond, there's a little problem. The ladder stops four feet down!" I hiss, trying to remain composed and not just run back to my little secluded place on the beach.

"Well the other ones came in this way, so I'm sure two intelligent people such as ourselves can manage to do it," he says calmly. His obvious composure in this situation is only making me more anxious.

I laugh nervously. "Please tell me you're joking."

Desmond just shrugs. "'fraid not."

"Well…how far down does it go?"

Desmond smiles at my obvious fear. "Very…very, _very_ far down."

I gulp. "Well how about _you_ go down, then open the door for _me_ on the other side," I suggest hopefully with a smile I hope he finds charming.

"Oh right, like you can hold my weight while I go down there?" he says, scoffing slightly.

I sniff and cross my arms. "I could, I am surprisingly strong…okay I couldn't. So shoot me if I'm not to keen on being thrown down some shaft in the ground!"

Desmond laughs. "I would hardly be throwing you, more of a wee push."

I roll my eyes. "Oh ha ha, it seems we have a comedian on the island," I say clapping slowly.

"Oh c'mon do yeh wanna get in there or not? Or are yeh chicken?" he asks with his little grin and a raised eyebrow…such a _Sawyer_ thing to do.

I know what he is trying to do, he is trying to bait me. And it worked. "I am _not_ chicken, I just don't have a death wish," I snap at him.

"Oh ok, so you're chicken then?" oh god he's doing that thing again, that 'I'm a stubborn ass and I know I'm going to win' thing.

"That's it! Okay, give me the rope. I'm going down."

Desmond seems slightly taken aback that I actually agreed. "You don't _have_ to go first, I can just tie the rope to a tree trunk or-"

"No no no, I'll go," I insist. Ha! Now you feel bad, and if I hurt myself you'll blame yourself. Sometimes it pays to play up the frailty thing but I can't play it for too long without wanting to gag.

Desmond reluctantly hands me the rope , tied at one end like a noose. "Right well, here's a torch. And if I'm going to fast just…"

"Yell at you to stop, tell you I'm not ready yet and that I wanna take it slow?" I smirk, seeing the surprised look on his face.

"Are we still talking about the same thing?" Says Desmond with a raised eyebrow and a rather shy smile.

"Depends, what're you talking about?" I say boldly whilst winking, liking the fact that I've made _him_ uncomfortable this time.

Desmond just laughs and looks at me for a slightly awkward moment. "Morgan, be careful."

"What is it with you guys? You all seem to think that I can't look after myself without some big strong man to take care of me," I say whilst stepping into the noose and tightening it around my hips, but not in an entirely hostile way.

Desmond takes a step closer to me and tugs of the noose, checking that it'll hold no doubt. "I never said that, unless of course you _want_ some big strong man to take care of you."

I ignore his chauvinistic statement, because at the present time I'm more worried about whatever the heck I'm going to do in this black hole. "Nice knowing you Desmond," I say, and before I even have time to think about what I'm doing I stand on my toes and kiss him on his unshaven cheek. I feel him tense up and pull back, slightly embarrassed with my forwardness to an almost stranger.

"What happened to the traditional handshake eh?" he asks, throwing my words back at me.

"Sorry, I was trying to be roguish and charismatic." Hmm…sounds familiar. I salute Desmond and climb down the short 'ladder'. Then I wait for his signal and I reluctantly let go and am surprised when the expected fall to my death doesn't occur.

"you alright?" he asks, his voice echoing through the tunnel.

"As right as I can be at the moment," I say in a slightly shaky voice. In what seems like an eternity I am lowered bit by bit until I see the wet grime covered floor. I land in a puddle but don't care as my shaky legs touch the ground. I am so relieved I could almost kiss the floor.

"Okay, I'm down. Now what?" I ask, and the rope is hastily pulled up again. I wait in silence and try to take a look at my surroundings but don't dare move by myself or without some sort of instructions from Desmond.

"Shh…I'm coming down too."

By the time I register the words he is already lowering himself slowly downwards. "Desmond! That's probably not the best idea," I say, watching cautiously, holding my breath.

"Well there isn't really-" as if my cynicism prompted it, the rope unties and all I hear is a surprised gasp from both Desmond and I before I am suddenly on the floor with a thud.

Now I still can't breathe but it is because I have a full grown man sprawled on top of me. "Oww…Desmond, are you okay?" I grumble, my lungs squashing with the weight of his body.

After a moment Desmond answers blearily. "Shite that hurt…oh shite, are you alright? I landed right on yeh," he says, turning on an angle that hits my directly in the ribs and looking me in the face.

"I can't really breathe…you're still on top of me," I wheeze, and only now do I realize how close our faces are.

"Oh…sorry," Desmond says in a low voice and in this awkward silence I hear what Sawyer had said about Desmond's so-called 'intentions'.

I gasp as soon as his weight shifts. "Oh please, feel free to stay if you wish. This is quite comfortable really," I laugh, and the movement causes me to wince slightly.

"You're a terrible flirt, for someone who isn't good at it," Desmond says in a strained voice, and I can no longer see his face now that he is a few feet away.

I reach over for my torch. "No, see, it was a _joke_…I can do jokes. Oh, you're bleeding," I say when I see his illuminated face. I reach over to take a look at the gash on his brow, blood slowly trickling down into his eye.

I tentatively turn his face towards me and he recoils as if burnt. "It's fine, really."

"Oi, let me have a look at it. Don't do the macho thing with me," I warn, my voice rising slightly as reach over again. Desmond swats my hands away.

"We don't have time right now, I'll be fine," he says, wiping his gash with his sleeve and smearing blood over his face. I sigh and move to get up, but my foot catches on the rope and I fall…onto Desmond.

"Sorry, the rope…I-I tripped," I explain lamely, avoiding his dark eyes.

"It's okay, I mean I'm sore and all but I'm not complaining," he says with a small smile, I am so close I can feel his breath on my face. I clamber off him and try to think of something witty to say but am interrupted by a loud beeping.

I turn towards the noise and notice another large metal door. I slowly walk towards it. The beeping continues. "Desmond, what's in there?" I ask hesitantly.

"We're running outta time!" Desmond hisses, running past me and pushing against the door until it slowly creaks open. I follow him numbly, unable to think or do anything.

I gasp.

There is someone _already_ in here.

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**Well, please review coz i could get fired for being late for work for this lol...how's THAT for a guilt trip?**


	18. Chapter 17: I stumble

**Disclaimer: I still don't own LOST, but i do own Sawyer...and Desmond. okay i don't bit just IMAGINE the fun that could be had! muahahahahah!**

**Author's Note: Thanks for all the reviews, they make me wanna jump up and down at work even if i make a fool of myself infront of bosses. Sorry about the delay, i went to sydney and it just ruined my groove completely and i was in holiday mode again. Anywho, i'm not sure you shall all like this but feel free to flame me if you wish :) . It really was a coincidence that i wrote this and it happens to come out the day after valentines day. Sorry for the typo's, i didn't really get to edit it properly as i have a syndfrome called mustsubmitnextchapterbeforebed syndrome, a terrible, TERRIBLE disease that i am taking medication for.**

**Thanks to Amy aka steam rolled harry potter for being awesome and nice and always motivating me during our lovely msn convos to keep writing or else lol.**

**Chapter Seventeen**

I stumble.

I almost collide into Desmond, who is standing stock-still just past the door, staring at the man already in the hatch.

"Box man? What the hell is going on? The button…the computer!" Desmond exclaims. This 'box man' just smiles oddly and raises his eyebrows at me. I decide very quickly that I don't like this man.

"Desmond, you're back," says this 'box man' with a surprised smile.

Desmond ignores the man and runs down the…well, the hall, I suppose.

I look quickly to the man who just sighs and shakes his head. I follow after Desmond as I don't want to be stuck with the scary bald man nor do I want to be alone in this place. The beeping is getting louder, or so it seems, as I chase after Desmond. I see him turn sharply to his left and follow him into the large room. I gape as I stare at the strange ceiling; it is made up of lots of triangular pieces of…something, making a sphere. I notice a countdown clock to my right and gasp, it say there is 23 seconds to go. 23 seconds until what? Whatever it is, I can't imagine it being a good thing.

"Move for christ's sake!" Desmond yells at the stunned man at the computer.

21, 20, 19…

"I'm sorry! I-I lost the page with the numbers on it!" explains the man weakly, stumbling off the chair. Numbers? What is so important about these numbers that has Desmond so worried?

14, 13, 12…

Desmond swears in his thick Scottish accent and I run over towards him, as if somehow my limited knowledge of computers will be of any help.

He types a series of numbers into the computer; 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 43, swears, deletes the last number and changed it to a 2.

7, 6, 5…

"Desmond…" I say, finally finding my voice. I really don't want to see what happens when this gets to zero.

He ignores me and, staring intensely at the computer screen, hits a button titled 'execute'. I close my eyes and brace myself for something, a bang, a crash, a bomb exploding, anything.

I open my eyes. The counter stops at two. The beeping has stopped. I exhale a breath I didn't know I was holding. The counter goes up to 108 minutes and starts again. Desmond slumps in his computer chair and rests his head against the glass of the computer screen, relief evident on his face.

"Phew, that was close," says the blond man on the floor.

"What the hell just happened?" I ask to nobody in particular, just wanting any kind of explanation.

Desmond jerks up quickly, leaving a smear of blood on the computer where his head had been resting, and glares at the man.

"What just happened is that this flamin' idiot almost killed us all! Why the hell are you here alone if you don't know what you're doin'?" he yells at the man, and for once I am slightly alarmed at his anger.

"He wasn't alone, Desmond," says a voice from behind me. Oh great, It's the bald man.

"Well what exactly were you doin', brother? You seemed pretty preoccupied standin' around doing shite all," Desmond says, turning his attention to the bald man, his temper and volume rising as he speaks.

"Wait, you're him, you're the guy who has been living here for all this time…I thought you had ran away." The blond man said slowly.

"Well, I'm back now. Honey I'm home," Desmond says sarcastically.

The bald man smiles at Desmond. "We can see that, and who is your friend here?" he inquires, settling his probing gaze on me.

"I'm-"

"She's none of your business, that's who she is," Desmond snaps, and takes a step closer to me as if he can 'protect' me from their inquisitive stares. Part of me is thankful as right now I am a little confused, but another part wishes that I wasn't treated like a fragile little child.

"I'm Morgan, and yes, I suppose I am a friend of Desmond's, we ah…_met_ a couple of days ago in the jungle. I was on the back part of the plane when it tore apart. I'm twenty years old, born in Australia, single, yes my boobs are real, I'm left handed and I have a cat named Smudge…anything else?" I look from the bald man to the blond, who has a harder time trying to hide his surprise. Desmond is looking at me with wide eyes and a bemused smirk.

"That's…plenty of information…Morgan," the bald one says whilst the other simply gapes.

I smile a little in triumph. "Great, I hope I'm not being too presumptuous if I was to ask who you two are?"

"I'm John Locke, I'm a regional sales manager for a-"

"Box company, right?" Desmond interjects.

"Yeah," the bald one, Locke, says.

The short blonde one takes a step towards us and sticks out his hand. "I'm Charlie, and yes…my boobs are real also."

"Nice to meet you Charlie," I say shaking his hand and trying to stifle my laughter. Desmond mumbles something that sounds like 'oh yeah, wonderfully nice' under his breath.

"Well, as lovely as this meeting is, I'm going to have to ask yeh to leave," Desmond says in a completely serious tone.

Three stunned faces turn to look at him. "But…but Desmond, we need-"

Desmond interrupts Locke with a shushing hand. "I think we can handle anything 'til tomorrow morning, then I don't give a damn if you come in here every bloody day." What exactly are they expecting to happen anyway? That thought leaves an unpleasant feeling in my stomach.

"Why do we-"

Desmond is getting very impatient for some reason, and I highly doubt that he doesn't care if they come for little 'visits' every day. "Do either of us look like we can give you any answers? Right now I just want to have a shower and go to bed. So, thanks for stopping by, see you in the morning, g'night," He ushers Locke and Charlie out of the door, and locks it behind him, turning the large round handle tight.

I finally find my voice as Desmond starts to stroll down the hall. "Desmond! That was really rude; they were just wanted to help," I chide, following him.

"I don't need their help, not that they _could_, if we hadn't shown up god knows what would've happened," he spits bitterly, and I don't like being on the receiving end of one of his tempers, I realize.

"Well…still, It was probably quite shocking for them to find an underground lair of _doom_ on this island."

I follow him to a little room with a bunk bed, his bedroom I assume. "My history with those people isn't great, okay." he says flopping onto the bottom bunk.

"What happened?" I ask, taking a position next to him.

"Oh nothing, just a little bit of a scuffle. So anyway…"

Desmond gets off the bed after an awkward silence and pulls something out of a drawer. "So, you gonna just sit there or be a polite host and show me around your humble abode?" I ask, following his lead and getting off the bed.

"Maybe later, right now I just want to get this fashionable little thing off me and burn it." He says, walking out of the room and most likely going into the bathroom to get changed. I look around for a while, noticing a few books scattered haphazardly around the place. Other than that its quite tidy, very much unlike my room back home. I quickly grow bored and feel uncomfortable snooping through his belongings, more so if I was caught. I walk out of the bedroom and turn down the nearest corner only to be met with an almost naked Desmond fumbling through a pile of clothes.

"Oh! Sorry I-I didn't know…you should've _warned_ me!" I say, covering my eyes with a hand, but not before noticing his shocked expression and his hands placed in front of his nether regions.

"It's okay, I have boxers on," he says, his hands now in their normal position and a blush staining his cheeks.

"And what lovely boxers they are," I say looking at the blue tartan pattern with raised eyebrows.

"I don't appreciate you mocking my boxers," he says, pulling on a t-shirt and glaring at me.

"I'm not mocking them, it's just I haven't seen you in anything other than that charming jumpsuit."

"Oh so now you're mocking my jumpsuit?"

I sigh, I think he's in one of those moods that I am frequently in, the 'I am going to argue every little word that comes out of your mouth' mood. "No, no you're the only person I know who looks good in a jumpsuit," I say with a slight smile, hoping he will quit the arguing thing as it is very tiring.

He barks al laugh and mocks my actions a few moments before, covering his face with a hand. "Awww, you're making me blush."

When he pulls his hand away I notice a smear of blood. "Oh, your head is still bleeding," I say and instantly go into 'mothering' mode, standing on my toes and pulling his face towards the light to get a better look.

"Is it? I didn't really notice," he says with indifference.

"I find that hard to believe, here, let me take a look at it. Don't even try the macho thing, as hard as it may be to believe, you bleed like everyone else." I remember saying the same thing to Sawyer just before he threw me into the water on our first 'encounter'. Funnily enough, now it doesn't seem such a bad memory anymore.

"What, you a nurse or something?" he inquires in a doubting tone.

"No, but I_ did_ have a baby brother," I say haughtily. Grabbing a shirt, and wetting it.

"Well I guess that counts for something," he says and winces as I start to clean his wound. Eventually the blood stops, as it isn't a deep wound, but it isn't 'nothing' either.

Only now do I notice the way he is looking at me, his dark eyes looking down at me intently. "It might get infected, you…you better be careful with that," I say in a quiet voice, avoiding his eyes by looking at my feet.

"If I knew _this_ would happen, I would've run away a long time ago," he says in an amused voice.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I ask, pulling back a little to regain a comfortable personal space.

"Oh just that I never in a million years thought that I would be here, in this place, with the most charming young woman I've ever met doting on me," he says, smiling charmingly in the process.

I scoff at his compliment. "Oh please, I'm not charming," I assure him.

Desmond rolls his eyes and closes the space between us in one stride. "I'd like to give you a compliment, and you're going to take it. I'd also like to give you this, if you don't mind." Before I even get to ask what he is giving me, I am answered by the feel of lips against mine. I gasp a little but for some reason I don't pull away, in fact I return it. He's kissing me, I realize, Desmond is kissing me and I am kissing back. His hand brushes under my hair to rest on my neck and my hands are holding onto his shoulders, more for support than anything else. I close my eyes, and an unbidden image of Sawyer pops into my head, face full of hatred and betrayal. I pull away and gasp, stepping backwards a little.

"Sorry, I-I shouldn't have done that," he says breathily, looking at the floor.

"It's not that, I-I just wasn't…expecting it," I say lamely. Oh nice one, as if anyone expects that to happen!

A painfully awkward silence ensues and I am about to say something mindless just to fill in the silence, but Desmond beats me to it. "Right, well umm, I guess-" I never get to hear what Desmond was about to say as I hear a muffled cry off in the distance.

"Help!"

My head snaps towards Desmond. "Who's that?" I ask, running toward the hatch door. He outruns me in an instance and I stop as he opens the door, the big guy, Hurley, runs in panting.

"Help! I need help!" he says, gasping for breath.

"What's wrong?" I ask the distraught man, panic starting to kick in.

"It's…Sawyer, he-he just…collapsed." My stomach hits the floor at the mention of his name. All of a sudden my throat is dry and I can hear a faint roaring, as if a stadium full of people is yelling all at once in the back of my mind.

Eventually I snap out of my shocked trance. "Where is he?" I ask urgently. Hurley doesn't answer, just runs out to the door. I follow and find him kneeling at Sawyer's side.

I crouch beside him and try to ignore the stinging behind me eyes. Sawyer is laying still, eyes closed and a sickly pallor to his skin. "Oh my god, oh god…is he…please tell me he's not…" I choke on my words, unable to say it for fear that it just might be true.

"Get the doctor," Desmond orders Hurley, but I barely hear it. I am too busy dealing with my own guilt.

I sob.

This is all my fault.

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Dum dum duuuummmmmmmm! Review please:) The leprechaun has suffered from review withdrawals for a bit and it'd cheer him up immensly :P oh btw waking up and seing that you have 10 reviews or so in the morning is the BEST feeling so thanks a bunch you guys for putting up with me. Xo muah oX


	19. Chapter 18: I watch

**Auhor's Note:** Okay so sue me, i was going to update like 5 days ago i swear, but i went to visit my dad and OMG he and his fiance are having a BABY! so i am going to be a bug sister...again! Umm i mean big sister. Holy cow. Anyway, ummm this has some swearing...like 2 words, and is kinda depressing but meh that's the way the cookie crumbles. Oh and thanks to all who read AND review, not just read...or just review?lol.

Ohohohohohoh and i FINISHED WORK! no more work at the moment, i am going to do the regular 18 yr old thing and be a LAZY ASS for like a week then get another job. !sigh! no more perving on certain sexy office man whom i had a dreamabout inwhich said man was naked and peeing in my bath.Got a new awesome comp too that doesn't resemble the hatch comp like the old one did lol. Haha WHY AM I TELLING YOU ALL THIS? it's not as if you care, lol sorry bout that.

**Disclaimer:** If I owned lost or any of the characters I would tie Sawyer up, get out some jam and cover him in it, then proceed to lick it off with perfect precision...okay so i'm back on earth now hehe.

Thanks to **steam rolled harry potter** for beta-ing even though she never says anything is wrong, and right now she is being annoying on messenger, grrr!

**Chapter Eighteen**

I watch.

It's the only thing my body is willing to do at this point.

Desmond puts his hand on Sawyers throat. "He's still got a pulse; it's not very strong though. The doctor better get here soon." As soon as I hear his first words my hope lifts, then crashes to the ground.

Desmond places a firm hand on my shoulder and squeezes, ending my staring competition with Sawyers closed eyes. "We should move him inside. It can't be any good for him out here." I look up at him through blurry eyes and nod.

"All right, now you take his legs and lift when I say so." Desmond loops his arms through Sawyers underarms and lifts him up. I tuck his ankles between my elbows and proceed to lift him off the ground. Desmond leads even though facing backwards towards his bedroom. I grab the blankets from the bunk beds and quickly lay them out on the concrete floor and Desmond lowers Sawyer onto the makeshift bed.

I look desperately towards Desmond. "What do we do now?" I ask him in a defeated voice.

He looks at me solemnly. "We wait."

I sigh. I've never been one for waiting patiently in stressful situations.

_I tap my foot impatiently. _

_God damn how hard is it, I just need a 'yes' or a 'no'. _

_It's really quite simple._

_Well actually, I need a 'no'. _

_It has to be 'no'. _

_Or…or I don't know what I'll do._

_I can't believe that with all the technological advancements we have made that it is still necessary to piss on a stick and wait for the colour to show._

_The door opens and I move to get up but its just one of the other nurses, pushing her cart full of delicious varieties of medication for all the loons. Well that is quite rude of me as I am considered to be one of those 'loons' also. A loon that may be knocked up, pregnant, expecting, with child._

_Child…I can't have a child. _I'm_ still a child._

_I don't even notice Ann walking in until I see her white loafers interrupt my intense study of the tiled floor._

_I swallow hard, trying to rid myself of the dry throat that just won't go away. _

"_So?" I ask with a slight tremor in my voice._

_Ann looks down at me disapprovingly and utters the word that will undoubtedly change my life._

"_Yes."_

_I furrow my brow, letting the information sink in. "Yes..as in yes I am having a baby, yes?"_

"_Yes as in sometime during the last couple of months you managed to sleep with some guy and get yourself knocked up."_

"_It…it wasn't like that," I say, shaking my head._

"_Oh really? Well what was it like then?"_

"_I'm not some slut, Ann. I didn't just do it as some scheme to try and get out of here, if that's what you're thinking." I say, my voice trembling even more as the familiar stinging starts behind me eyes._

"_Well why did you do it you stupid girl! You had your whole life ahead of you and now you've gone and done this. What a foolish, foolish thing to do for a moment of 'fun'." I know she is only being so harsh because she cares about me, but it hurts much more coming from somebody I trust._

"_It wasn't a 'bit of fun' Ann, I _love_ him." I say, and the tears finally break free, flowing down my face._

"_Well Morgan, you better pray to god that he loves you back, or this might just be the biggest mistake of your life."_

"Here, take this. Are you gonna be okay?" Desmond says handing me a hanky, thankfully snapping me out of that painful memory.

"I can't just sit here, isn't there anything we can do 'til the doctor comes? This waiting is driving me insane," I say, staring at Sawyer's stationary form.

"Well we shouldn't touch him, he could have the sickness," he says, looking warily at Sawyer.

"Bloody hell, Desmond! Stop it with this ridiculous 'sickness' theory okay? He is most likely sick from his infected gunshot wound," I snap at him harshly.

"You don't bloody believe me, why does no one ever fuckin' believe me!" he asks incredulously.

"Probably because you are talking complete crap, Desmond. Sawyer does not have this imaginary sickness; No one has this imaginary sickness. Some crazy guy tells you a story and you just believe him!"

"You didn't see Kelvin, he was _not_ normal, he got the sickness," he says in such a naïve sincerity that I want to hit him, hurt him, make him see that people lie all the time.

"Just shut up, shut up! You can't just believe everything that comes out of some ones mouth!" I scream at him.

"You believed me before," he says walking towards me.

"Well…maybe I should've listened to Sawyer. If I had he wouldn't be…he wouldn't-" I choke on my words and burst into tears, and before I know it I'm on the ground shaking with sobs. Desmond crouches down to my level and tentatively pats me on the back. "It's all m-my fault, Desmond. If I had known how to f-fix his shoulder then he wouldn't be… d-dying right now," I say miserably, hiding my face in my hands.

"It's okay Morgan, you can't possibly blame yourself for this," he says as I lean forward and cry on his shoulder in such a cliché way that I would either laugh or cringe if it wasn't me in this situation. "Shhhh…he'll be alright," Desmond says quietly, either not noticing or caring about the puddle I am creative on his shoulder.

"I'm sorry," I say, and I'm not sure whether I am talking to Desmond or Sawyer.

"_I'm sorry," I say, not able to look him in the eye._

_Sean looks confused and turns around, no doubt to make sure no one else is around. "Sorry for what?"_

_I bite my lip. How the hell am I meant to tell him? What if he doesn't believe me? What if he doesn't _want_ me?_

_He sits down and hesitantly grabs my hand. He is always so hesitant these days._

"_I…I have something to tell you," I say, trying to smile charmingly. Bad news always seems better with a smile, or so I've heard._

"_Oh really?" he says with a smile and leans in for a kiss which I happily, no eagerly, return. I pull back and wiggle my finger in mock disapproval. "Dr. Sean Williams, if I didn't know better, I'd think the only reason you're here is because you think you're gonna get some."_

"_Let's call it a 'routine check up'," he says brushing the hair out of me eyes in a tender gesture that he usually wouldn't dare show in this place._

"_A routine check up my skirt, you mean?" It was meant as a joke but surprisingly the words come out bitter._

_His smile dims. "What's wrong?"_

"_Sean, do you love me?" I blurt out hastily. He looks surprised, a little uneasy perhaps. "Jesus Morgan, you really know how to put the pressure on," he says and I lower my eyes, waiting for the 'I care for you, but not like that'. "But even though all logic goes against it, and you'll probably be the death of me one day, yes I do." I do a double take and smile hugely, "Good, 'cause I do too." He almost tumbles backwards as I leap towards him, kissing him passionately._

"_Why do you ask?" He says, rearranging himself with an almost guilty look. _

"_Well it's to do with…a previous check up." I say, hoping he will understand my hint. I am answered with a furrowed brow and perplexed eyes._

"_Bloody hell Sean, for a doctor you're not too bright. What I was meaning to say is…is that I'm…I'm bloody pregnant." His hand drops from mine instantly and his face is frozen in absolute shock. His mouth moves silently for a moment until he finally gets the words out._

"_H-how?" _

"_Well, what happens is the man, he has a thing called a penis, and a woman, she has a thing called-"_

"_Morgan! I know how, I mean…I…I'm the father?" he asks, his mouth barely able to form the word. Dread starts to kick in, he isn't going to believe me._

"_No, it must be one of the many other doctors in here that I'm sleeping with," I snap sarcastically, "Of course you're the father you bloody idiot, and I'd appreciate it if you'd close your bloody mouth."_

_We are both silent for a moment until he finally speaks up. "Well, what are we gonna do?"_

_I look at him, puzzled. "What do you mean, what else would we do?"_

_He looks around his shoulder towards the small window in the door. "You're not actually going to keep it, are you?" he hisses in disbelief. In an instant he goes from my favourite person in the world to my most despised._

_I stare at him in absolute rage. "Get out," I say, pushing him away from me in disgust._

"_Morgan, we need to talk-"_

"_Get out, now!" _

_He tries to step towards me and place a hand on my shoulder but I push it away forcefully. "I'm you Doctor, I know what's best-"_

"_No Sean, I know what's best, it's best if you leave," I say, with my finger on the call out button threateningly._

"_Morgan…" he is only a smeared blue shape now due to the tears blurring my vision._

"_I hate you." _

"Okay, where is he?" I hear a voice say hastily from behind. It is a man, carrying a bag. The Doctor, I presume. I jump up instantly, ready to help.

"Desmond, get me any medical supplies you can find, Oh…" he stops in his tracks and stares at me in surprise.

"Umm…so you're the doctor then, well he's…he's still got a pulse but Desmond said it's very faint," I say quietly, avoiding his eyes. The doctor crouches next to Sawyer and checks for a pulse, opens his eyes and shines a torch on them and does other doctoral things that make little to no sense to me.

"Has he ever come back into consciousness?" It takes me a moment to realize he is talking to me.

"No, I –I don't think so," I say uncertainly.

"Right." He resumes his work on Sawyer without a second glance at me. _Don't you wanna know who I am? Where I came from?_

"I'll be fine now, thanks."

"I can help."

"Just…just go, please."

I nod reluctantly and pace up and down nervously like a worried family member at a hospital…I've only known the guy for a week! Nevertheless I still pace up and down for the next…however long, often looking up to try and see the doctor's progress. It feels like he's been tending to him for an eternity.

I jump when a hand touches me on the shoulder. "Are you okay, your gonna wear a track in that floor if you don't stop pacing like that," Desmond says quietly so only I can hear.

"I'm fine, it's Sawyer that I'm slightly more worried about," I say, unintentionally harsh.

Desmond sighs. "Well, you're not looking too well yourself. Just relax, everything will be fine."

"You know, every time I am told 'it will be fine' it's exactly the opposite." I snap, turning away.

"_Okay, now just relax, this might feel a little cold."_

_I jump slightly as the clear jelly is rubbed onto my stomach. I'm not especially fond about other people touching me, but it's a price worth paying if everything is all right. _

"_I-there was…blood." I say in a faltering voice._

"_Blood?" _

"_When I went to the toilet yesterday, there was blood. That's bad, isn't it?"_

_The doctor considers what I said for a moment. "Not necessarily." _

_He turns towards me. "How did you get that bruise on your wrist?"_

"_Oh…I…I got it jammed into the car door a few days ago."_

_He looks skeptically at me. "That's odd."_

_I laugh nervously and change the topic immediately. "Yes, well, so what can you tell me?"_

"_Have you felt the baby move?"_

"_Not in the last few days."_

"_Any morning sickness?"_

"_No, but I never really had it badly before either." Dread is starting to sink in as I put the pieces together._

"_Okay, well let's take a look."_

_I look at the little monitor and it feels like there is lead in my stomach. "Why…why isn't it moving?"_

"_I'm sorry."_

"_No…no. No, please, try again. "The tears are coming. I blindly hope that there was some sort of mistake, even though I know there isn't._

"_I'm very sorry, you've lost the baby."_

"_No…please. Oh god, no." I sob, cradling my stomach as if I can protect it, that what he's saying isn't true._

"_It was a girl." The news makes me sob harder, now the baby has a gender, an identity, and it makes it so much worse._

_I'm going to kill that bastard for taking my little girl away._

"Oh shit. Desmond, I need some help over here!" I gasp as I crash out of that memory and see the doctor holding Sawyer, who is shaking convulsively.

"Sawyer!" I yelp, running towards him.

"Stay back! Desmond can help, he trained to be a doctor." Desmond looks guiltily at me, eyes wide and mouth working silently for a short explanation.

"What? But…you could've…" I mumble, completely baffled.

Jack interrupts me. "He's gone into shock. If we can't get him to stabilize he'll die."

* * *

Okay, so yeah i've ran out of "I...'s" to start and finish off the chappies with which you are probably happy about as it was LAME anyway, but this was originally just a 2000 word story for my english class so...there LOL.

Review please...and send money, or i shan't be able to buy any jam to cover Sawyer in and then i don't know what i'd do. o0


	20. Chapter 19: I stutter

**Author's Note: Yes! I am ALIVE! I just had...umm...well nothing major, except i might have to move in with my dad due to family troubles with my mum (cries) but i still got this done! Sorry for making you wait so long and i hope ppl are still reading this. :)**

**Disclaimer**: **IfI owned Lost, you'd know about it.**

**Previously on Keep your enemies closer:**

"Desmond, what's in there?" I ask hesitantly.

"We're running outta time!" Desmond hisses, running past me and pushing against the door until it slowly creaks open. I follow him numbly, unable to think or do anything.

I gasp.

There is someone _already_ in the hatch.**

* * *

**

Desmondtypes a series of numbers into the computer; 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 43, swears, deletes the last number and changed it to a 2. 

7, 6, 5…

The counter stops at two. The beeping has stopped. I exhale a breath I didn't know I was holding. The counter goes up to 108 minutes and starts again. Desmond slumps in his computer chair and rests his head against the glass of the computer screen, relief evident on his face.

"Phew, that was close," says the blond man on the floor.

* * *

Desmond rolls his eyes and closes the space between us in one stride. "I'd like to give you a compliment, and you're going to take it. I'd also like to give you this, if you don't mind." Before I even get to ask what he is giving me, I am answered by the feel of lips against mine. I gasp a little but for some reason I don't pull away, in fact I return it. He's kissing me, I realize, Desmond is kissing me and I am kissing back. I close my eyes, and an unbidden image of Sawyer pops into my head, face full of hatred and betrayal. I pull away and gasp, stepping backwards a little.

* * *

"What's wrong?" I ask the distraught man, panic starting to kick in. 

"It's…Sawyer, he-he just…collapsed."

"Where is he?" I ask urgently. Hurley doesn't answer, just runs out to the door. I follow and find him kneeling at Sawyer's side.

Sawyer is laying still, eyes closed and a sickly pallor to his skin. "Oh my god, oh god…is he…please tell me he's not…" I choke on my words, unable to say it for fear that it just might be true.

Desmond turns to Hurley. "Get the doctor." **

* * *

**

_(flashback)_

_I look at the little monitor and it feels like there is lead in my stomach. "Why…why isn't it moving?"_

"_I'm sorry."_

"_No…no. No, please, try again. "The tears are coming. I blindly hope that there was some sort of mistake, even though I know there isn't._

"_I'm very sorry, you've lost the baby."_

"_No…please. Oh god, no." I sob, cradling my stomach as if I can protect it, that what he's saying isn't true._

"_It was a girl." _

* * *

"Oh shit. Desmond, I need some help over here!" I gasp as I crash out of that memory and see the doctor holding Sawyer, who is shaking convulsively. 

"Sawyer!" I yelp, running towards him.

"Stay back! Desmond can help, he trained to be a doctor." Desmond looks guiltily at me, eyes wide and mouth working silently for a short explanation.

"What? But…you could've…" I mumble, completely baffled.

Jack interrupts me. "He's gone into shock. If we can't get him to stabilize he'll die."

**Chapter Nineteen**

I stutter.

"Wh-what?" I ask in complete disbelief, my face going from Desmond's to Jack's in an instant.

"I don't have time for this! Just stay back so we can fix him," jack says angrily, locking eyes with me, and I feel like a six year-old child being scolded.

"You can't let him die! Please…it's all my fault," I wail, grabbing his arm.

His head snaps in my direction so quick that I let go instantly. "I said _stay back_."

I take a few steps back and try to compose myself, trying to not let the tears flow _again_. But as I look at them- Jack and Desmond talking quickly, too quickly for me to understand in my present state, and Sawyer unmoving and sickly looking-my composure doesn't last long.

Angry tears spill down my face. This wasn't supposed to happen. Sawyer had always seemed so strong and resolute, unfaltering in his confidence and yes, sometimes even arrogance. He didn't show weakness, he chose to believe there wasn't any in him, and I suppose I started to believe it too.

A low moan escapes between Sawyer's lips and I notice that his shoulder is bleeding again. Jack is stitching up his wound, blood coating his fingers and most of Sawyer's arm. Desmond is holding Sawyer down whilst avoiding looking towards the wound. If Desmond is holding him down, then that means Sawyer is fighting. The thought makes me smile, a stubborn bastard even in a situation like this, Sawyer won't let a trivial thing such as a bullet take him down.

Please let that be true.

"Okay, I need water, lots of water, we gotta get his temperature down," Jack says.

"The shower?" Desmond asks.

Jack nods and they lift Sawyer up carefully. I move to help, but with a death glare from Jack I lead them towards the bathroom.

I open the door and turn on the cold water. Jack and Desmond slump Sawyer down in the shower and Jack gets in with him, shaking him slightly, feeling for his temperature. Then the tiniest movement of Sawyer's lips indicate that he said something, he _spoke. _Then, his eyelids flutter open for the smallest of moments, pupils dilating and taking in the sight before him. "Jackass…" and then they're closed. I want to jump up and down, I want to thank the doctor, I want to hug Sawyer. He's _alive_.

I hardly remember the journey back to the room, or Jack asking Desmond for a clean set clothes to change Sawyer into, but I find myself out in the kitchen, waiting for Sawyer to be decent enough for me to go back in. It's not like I haven't seen…well, _most_ of it before anyway.

The door opens, and out steps Desmond. Before I even have time to register what I'm doing, my hand reaches back and I slap him hard on the face. "What the f-"

"You're a doctor? You're a doctor! How…how could you not tell me this?" I ask, trying _not_ to hit him again and relax.

He steps forward to try and grab my arm, but I shrug him off. "Look, it's not what you're thinking-"

"Sawyer was _dying_, and you could've fixed him…but you just _sat_ there!" I yell at him in disbelief.

He grabs my arm a second time, and pulls me away from the kitchen and further away from Jack. "I'm _not_ a doctor!"

"Well, _he_ seems to think otherwise…and I'd think he'd know, being one himself," I say tightly, feeling his hands press hard on my shoulders. It hurts but I'd never let him know that.

"Well, trust me, he doesn't know," Desmond says, and his temper is getting the better of him. His hands are pressing harder now and I'm sure there will be bruises later on.

I flail my arms about until they are free. "Trust you? Trust you! That's hilarious…and how dare _you_ get angry at _me_! I'm not the one who's been hiding rather important information about myself," I say, rounding on him.

"What, that I'm_ not_ a doctor? Well then I guess you've been hiding the fact that _you're_ not a doctor too!" he says, completely dumbfounded.

I try to hide the grin that is threatening to show on my face. "I think I've made it pretty clear from the start that I have a very minute amount of medical knowledge, Desmond." How do men do it? One second I swear I could murder them, the next I am grinning like a fool at some idiotic thing they've said.

"Well, I trained to be a doctor…but I never really learnt much, I was only there for 5 months. So I know how to bandage and do some really dodgy stitches, and how to look after a sprained ankle or a dislocated shoulder…I think Sawyer had something a wee but worse than all that."

"Yes well, I suppose so…okay, I'm sorry," I say, looking at the ground.

"Yeah…me too."

"I umm…I think I'm going to have bruises from all that manhandling of yours," I say with a raised eyebrow, daring him to argue.

"I've never manhandled a woman in my life," he says in complete confidence.

"Well, you have now, look at this," I say, smirking and pulling down the neck of my t-shirt to show him the mark left on my shoulder from our earlier argument.

"I'm very sorry, I didn't mean to…you just… you just went batty and I just wanted you to calm down. You've got some way of irritating me beyond belief," he says with that lopsided grin.

"Don't worry, the feeling is mutual."

He narrows his eyes in thought and looks towards me. "You know what, if I didn't know better I'd think you actually like this, the fighting and the shouting and the bruises."

For a long while I am silent. How could a _man_ read people so well? I didn't exactly like fighting…but, at least it was human interaction, the only type of human interaction I was really comfortable with. "Well, luckily you _do_ know better."

"Well, the thing is, I'm not exactly sure that I _do_ know-" Desmond is interrupted by Jack popping out of the bedroom, looking rather pleased wit himself.

"He's going to be okay," he says clearly in his 'doctor voice'. I lurch forward and grab his hand, shaking it rather enthusiastically. "Thank you, thank you so much!" I say, looking into his wide eyes.

"You're welcome. You don't need to thank me though, I might not be best friends with Sawyer but I'd never let him die," he says laughing slightly.

"Well I figured you should get thanks from someone, you're never getting any from Sawyer," I say, smiling slightly.

He laughs and nods his head. "Well, it seems you've got him all worked out pretty quickly," he sticks out his hand, "I'm Jack, by the way."

I shake his hand much more calmly this time. "Yeah I know, you're quite the celebrity on this island. I'm Morgan."

"Oh…so _you're_ Morgan…nice to meet you." I frown up at him. What did he mean by that? Did the bald guy say something? Maybe the big guy, Hurley?

"About before…I didn't mean to be so rude, it's just, well…manners are the last thing on my mind in situations like that," he says seriously.

"Oh its fine, you fixed Sawyer so I can hardly be annoyed at you."

"Well do you two think you'll be able to look after him for a while? I've got to get back to camp and explain…all of this. They were a little worried when Hurley came running through the jungle screaming my name."

I laugh slightly. "I bet they were. Yes I think we can manage looking after him for a while."

"Great. Well just…make sure he stays hydrated and comfortable. If you need me you just follow the torches down to the beach…it shouldn't be too hard to find the camp."

"How long do you think you'll be?" Desmond asks, speaking up for the first time.

"A little over an hour"

"Okay, we'll fetch you if there's something wrong." He assures Jack. The Doctor leaves with a long skeptical look at Desmond and a nod, the big hatch door groaning shut.

I instantly run into the bedroom and grab the computer chair, rolling over next to Sawyer's still form. He looks much better now, the colour is back on his face and it is no longer set in a pained expression. His chest is rising and falling in a steady motion much to my relief. I brush the hair away from his face gently laughing a little as it falls instantly back into his eyes. My god, everything about the man is stubborn.

Sawyer looks so peaceful, so…innocent as he lies there that its almost like looking at a completely different person. My eyes widen when his eyes flutter a moment, on the verge of opening, but they never do.

"Sawyer?" I whisper uncertainly, "Sawyer, it's Morgan. Can you hear me?"

Nothing happens, but for some reason I feel compelled to continue, to apologize.

"Sawyer, I'm…I'm so sorry. If I had went with you then this might not have happened. If I hadn't attacked you then this definitely wouldn't have happened," tears are welling in my eyes and it's getting increasingly hard to speak with every word, "You have to wake up, Sawyer, so I can apologize to you face to face. Then you can gloat and smirk all you want. You can even call me 'princess' or 'darlin', I don't _care_ as long as you get better. The truth is Sawyer…if you don't get better I'll never forgive myself, because…because you're the only friend I've got." I cover my face in my hands and try to stop myself from crying but it doesn't work.

"I swear to god I saw him smile just then," a voice says behind me.

"I turn my red eyes towards Desmond. "Oh please, the poor guy's barely conscious and you still won't give him a break!" I yell in Sawyer's defense.

"Look! He's doin' it again!" He points to Sawyer's form and when I turn Sawyer's face is the same it has been when I first came in.

"Look Desmond, I know you don't like him very much but this is ridiculous! Sawyer is…"this time when I turn I see Sawyers green eyes looking at me and the smallest of grins on his face.

I squeal.

Sawyer is most definitely awake.

* * *

ok so i hope that was good! review please as i only got about half of what i usually do for my last chappie which i thought was good but umm...obviously it wasn't :(. My leprechaun was very very upset and even had to go into councelling! lol 

(Puts sugababes on)

"If you're ready to review, you gotta push the button and let me know, before i get the wrong idea and spew, you gotta give some feedback you know you want to.." LOL that never needs to happen again...you can make it all stop.


	21. Chapter 20: I beam

**Author's Note:** Aaaarg i had this done a day ago but was all stupid and stubborn and not letting me submit my document.OK, i said next chapter up soon and...well it all depends on your version of 'soon' doesn't it? So i am terribly sorry for the delay but i am thinking of maybe deleting this fic, because it is pointless. I don't know if anyone reads this anyhow but thanks for all the people who have read and reviewed the past 6 months or so.

Oh btw, started a mists of avalon fic called **"Forbidden Fruit" (**about King Arthurs sister Morgaine and a lover mmm schmexy), worked really really hard on it and i have a massive total of 2 reviews. This makes me sad. Yes i know what you're thinking, and yes, i am totally pimping my story lol. Please check it out if you have a spare minute, because it was a serious attempt at writing, whilst this is me passing time by writing about my fav t.v show.

**Disclaimer:** Don't own lost because if i did i would make Sawyer become a nudist.

thanks again to** the silent she wolf **and** steamrolledharrypotter,** you guys make me all warm and fuzzy inside with your lovely comments and inspiration and beta powers. :D

* * *

**Chapter Twenty**

I beam.

My eyes almost bulge out of their sockets and I practically throw myself at Sawyer.

"Oh my god, Sawyer! You're awake! I…I…you're awake!" I exclaim excitedly.

I don't notice the wince as I crush him in a hug, but I notice his hiss of pain and his rather obvious "Ouch! Damn woman, calm down!"

I relinquish my death grip on him and compose myself, blushing a little at my obvious enthusiasm.

"Sorry, I just…I thought I'd lost you."

Sawyer raises his eyebrows and a slow grin spreads on his face. "Lost me? Since when have I been _yours_ to lose?"

My eyes widen in shock when I realize the deepness of my words and my face feels as if it's glowing. "I-I…that was a stupid way of wording it, I just meant I thought you were…gone."

Sawyer's brow furrows and he gives a small chuckle. "You mean dead?"

I roll my eyes at his lack of subtlety. "Yes, Sawyer, Dead. I was trying to put it lightly."

He looks around the room with a scrutinizing gaze and then turns his gaze back to me, along with his characteristic raised eyebrow and smirk. "Well I s'pose this is heaven then?"

"Maybe," I say with a small smile.

Our eyes lock for an uncomfortably long time, and I can almost but never quite read the thoughts swirling around in his head. Then he blinks and that 'I have a great one liner coming' twinkle is back in his eye. "Nah, it can't be 'coz you're still fully clothed and I can't see a damn chili dog anywhere."

I look downwards to hide the grin on my face. _Oh he's back with vengeance._ "I see you're still as pompous as ever."

"I see you're still as…well I'm too damn tired to think of just one word to describe it."

I put on a face of mock worry and pat him on his unshaven cheek. "Oh, eloquent too."

"Oh shut it. Where are we anyhow?"

"We are in…Desmond's house." I saw with a flourish of arms in a mediocre impersonation of a game show prize wench.

Desmond suddenly loses his slight glower at the mention of his name. "What? Oh…yeah."

The two men size each other up for quite a while before Sawyer turns back to me. "I was hopin' we were in a weirdly furnished hotel room. _Alone_." His eyebrows waggle in a way that I can only describe as cheesy and perverted.

"Sorry to burst your bubble," Desmond says sarcastically.

"I guess I'll be okay…with a little consoling," he says, opening his arms for a hug.

I laugh and walk towards him. "I'm only doing this because you almost died, not due to some heart wrenching affection I feel for you."

He smirks arrogantly as I wrap my arms stiffly around him in a very awkward display of affection, keeping a few inches distance between us. "That's not what you said before," he whispers in my ear, and I can hear the smile in his voice.

"Well…people say stupid things when they're upset," I say whilst trying to extract myself from his rather strong grip. He, being Sawyer, only holds tighter.

"But you _were_ upset" One of his hands starts to wander downwards and I wrench an arm free and slap it.

"Hey! It might surprise you to know that I'm not a heartless bitch all of the time." I say whilst toppling off the bed a little awkwardly and landing in a giggling heap on the floor. I can still feel the trail his hand traveled down my back.

Sawyer looks towards Desmond who is clearly unimpressed. "What you so sour 'bout, Scottie?" he asks with a frustratingly smug grin.

Desmond doesn't look towards Sawyer; he looks at me with narrowed eyes. "Me? Nothing, what on earth have I got to be sour about?" With that he stops leaning against the wall and walks past me to the door.

I stumble off the floor and catch his arm. "Desmond?" I ask anxiously, trying to see his face which he keeps turned away from me.

He pushes my hand off his arm as if it burnt him. When I look questioningly into his eyes I am met with anger and hurt. "No, you got Sawyer back, and now you're happy…everyone's happy," he says in a flat, emotionless voice and leaves the room, shutting the door behind more forcefully than needed.

"Desmond, that's not true-"

"Wait, why are you apologizing to _him_?" Sawyer asks, brows drawn together.

"Because I…actually, it's none of your business."

"Damn, you two went at it, didn't you? I mean I knew you liked him but I didn't actually think you'd pounce on him the second you got here!" he says incredulously.

"Excuse me?" I ask, eyes and mouth wide open.

Sawyer looks increasingly pleased with himself but there is a hint of annoyance in his voice and his face. "Well, well, well, not such an innocent little girl after all. How was it? Do you like it on top? I reckon you would, and are you a moaner or a screamer? Probably likes it when he calls you a-"

I slap him hard across the face and take a cautionary step back so that Sawyer, in his present state, is unable to reach me. "I don't care if you've lost half of your mental functions; _never_ presume to speak to me like that again."

Sawyer lunges at me as much as possible without falling off the bed. "Bitch! You'd hit a dying man?"

I scoff and roll my eyes skywards. "I wish."

"Well you can't just _hit_ _me_ for telling the truth." He yells, rubbing his right cheek and scowling at me.

"It was _not_ the truth!"

"So what you're saying is…you two _didn't_ go at it?" he inquires, trying to sound casual and failing miserably.

"That's exactly…none of your business. Maybe we did, maybe we didn't. Either way, I'm having a hard time thinking of a reason why you'd care." I manage to keep my voice steady even though am talking absolute crap, and hope my face doesn't betray me.

"I _don't_ care."

The bluntness of it stings a little, and my silly pride would never let Sawyer see that his words hurt. "Well good! Because we _did_ have sex, we did it right on that bed you're lying on…twice!"

He snickers at me and narrows his gaze. "You're shittin' me."

I shrug nonchalantly and hope desperately that Desmond can't hear what I am saying. "I shit you not. And you know what; we'll probably do it again, maybe in the lounge, or maybe on the kitchen bench. And then there'll be you, with nothing but your own hand to keep you company."

Sawyer refuses to be baited. "I don't believe you," he says simply.

I laugh condescendingly at him. "I don't _care_ if you believe me."

I see a flicker of uncertainty cross his face. "Well…I think you do."

"You should probably see to that, you can cause some serious damage if you don't do the whole thinking thing in moderation." I say with a tight smile, zipping up my backpack that I had thrown on the floor. There is silence for a while and I hope that this conversation is over so I can leave this exceedingly awkward situation.

"Once you've grabbed that stick outta your ass, you can go get freckles…Kate, she's probably missin' me," He says with the arrogance that I assume was attached to him at birth.

I frown. _Who is this 'Kate' girl, and why would she be missing Sawyer? Maybe she is his girlfriend? Maybe a relative? Why hasn't Sawyer ever mentioned her before? Why the hell am I feeling jealous_? "…Kate?"

"Yeah, you can't miss her, she's hard to miss. Pretty, dark hair, freckles, skinny…kinda looks like you, just more attractive." He says and my hand twitches, but I control the urge to hit him by picking up my backpack so that my hands are around something other than his neck.

"Hmmm okay, well while I _don't_ go and do that, perhaps you could locate your arse, then proceed to shove your head up it," I say with a tight smile and saunter towards the door, victorious, in my mind at least.

"I'd rather shove my-" I don't hear whatever crude comment he was about to make, because the alarm for the numbers starts and drowns his words out, and I shut the bedroom door behind me, leaving a very confused Sawyer.

I huff.

He hasn't changed at all.

* * *

**So there it is, feel free to hurl abuse at me, i deserve it. Or better yet, check out my other fic lol coz umm...the leprechaun says so. And what the leprechaun says goes dammit:D**


	22. Chapter 21: I frown

**Authors Note: **Sorry! I can't believe it took so long for me to update, if anyone still reads this that is lol. I got another job so life has been pretty hectic, also i don't know how often i will be able to update as my mum is cancelling the internet because my sister was wagging school and going on the comp instead! This makes me sad, so i am updating at work. shhh hehe. Thanks to everyone who has reviewed! Thanks also to Amy and Kate for being very supportive and kind beta's.

I also have a little ficlet with Morgan when she worked in a book store called "**Problem Customer**" and two very attractive and now deceased siblings, hint hint. Please check that out idf you have time. :D

**warning**: this chapter has some themes not suitable for little 11 year olds, not that i think any little 11 year olds read this.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Lost. Not then, not now, not ever.

**Chapter Twenty-One**

I frown.

For some reason I am practically running down the cold dark hallway of the hatch whilst desperately wanting to turn around and avoid Desmond for as long as possible. The reason for this is partially because I know he is angry at me and also I had just told Sawyer that Desmond and I had participated in fictional hatch sex; not once, but twice.

I can't even think about it without blushing like an idiotic schoolgirl, how on earth am I supposed to talk to Desmond, the very man who participated in aforementioned fictional hatch sex.

I find him sitting on the computer chair, glaring at the computer screen.

"Desmond, I thought it was my turn to do this, but if you wanna-"

He interrupts me, still not taking his eyes from the screen. "It's your turn; I just didn't want to drag you from Sawyer. I'm surprised you actually heard the alarm going off through your lovers haze, He says disdainfully.

"What? Sawyer and I are just friends, and half the time we aren't even

That," I say, leaning over him-as he makes no intention of moving- and typing in the numbers. I reread them three times before pressing the execute button, and am grateful to see the timer go back up to 108:00.

He takes his eyes off the screen and narrows them at me. "Oh yeah, I suppose he was just giving your arse a friendly squeeze before?"

For some reason the idea of Sawyer manhandling me isn't as repulsive as it once might've been. It's just the way he jokes, and I know it's not the best way to go about it but he's not exactly refined. "Besides, we just had a fight", I say lightly, trying and most likely failing at pretending I don't care.

He raises his eyebrows at this knowledge and I think for a moment that he might just be friendly and take my side. "Another lovers tiff? How terribly dreadful for you that must be."

I sigh exhaustedly. "Why is it that Sawyer can't get it around his thick skull that you and I aren't an item, and you can't get it around your thick skull that Sawyer and I aren't an item! I am item-less!" I exclaim, sitting on a chair next to Desmond.

"Well, maybe if you didn't flirt with every man you meet I'd think

Otherwise."

My eyes narrow at his accusation. "Oh sorry, how long have you known me?

That's right, four days," I say, kicking the seat of the computer chair, leaving Desmond spinning like an idiot.

He eventually comes to a halt and looks at me angrily. "So because I haven't known you long I can't have my opinion?"

I get off the chair and grab my backpack from where I had previously thrown it.

"No, you're entitled to your opinion, and I'm entitled to get angry at your opinion." I sling it over my shoulder and walk away, unable to have another argument when all I want to do is have a shower and sleep.

I hear Desmond's patronizing voice behind me. "That's it, just walk away.

That'll fix everything."

"Maybe it will," I say lightly, refusing to get angry; refusing to let him bait me.

"It's still probably dark outside, and you don't know where you're going…where _are_ you going?" His voice is now practical, but I refuse to listen to him.

I look back at Desmond dispassionately from the door, "Somewhere where the company has a smaller portion of bastards." The hatch door grinds shut and I walk towards what I assume is the exit. It occurs to me now that Desmond is right; I have no idea where I'm going.

I refuse to turn back though, knowing how smug Desmond would be about being right, and knowing Sawyer would be smug because…he's Sawyer.

I walk through the dark corridor until I find a smaller door practically identical to the one I previously went through. It takes three goes before the door will budge but eventually gives way and I stumble into the gloomy jungle.

It takes a moment for me to realize that it is raining, and only an instant longer for me to regret this little burst of rebellion.

After a minute of looking around I start to walk because looking around did no good. Each step I take into the murky jungle heightens my feeling of anxiety; but if nothing happened when Sawyer and I were trudging through this horrible place why would anything happen when I'm alone? I mean, it's not as if I'm the idiotic loud-mouthed girl in the horror films that says she isn't scared then moments later gets brutally-and ironically-murdered. Am I?

With that thought running through my mind, I continue on my trek through the jungle with an increasing anxiety, as if there is some unseen predator lurking nearby and I am its prey.

"I'll be back in a couple of hours, there's hotdogs in the fridge for dinner, and feed the cat please."

Panic.

"Mum! Umm…actually, I wanna stay at Sean's tonight. His parents said it was fine, and-"

"You're not staying at Sean's house. If I didn't know better I think you were sneaking off with him to...I don't want you sleeping at his house."

"Please, I swear it's nothing like that. In fact it's gross that you'd even think I'd do that, I've known him since I was eight!"

"I said no, and that's final. If you're scared to be alone then don't worry, David's upstairs in his study."

Despair.

"No, but-"

Slam. She's gone.

Noise from upstairs.

"Oh hello Morgan, is your mum gone?"

Dread.

"Yeah, work called. She'll only be a few hours. I'm-I'm going out."

"I believe your mum said you're not allowed out."

He's coming closer, back away. "No, she said I can't go to Sean's."

"You're not going anywhere." Harsh grip; Whisky breath.

"Let me go!" Kick and scream; bite and scratch.

"You can flail about all you want; you're only delaying the inevitable.

Besides, you know I like some fight in a- aagghh! You little whore!"

Fist connects with face; sobbing on the floor.

"No, please…please! I-I'll do anything, just don't do it, please!"

"You think you're sorry now…"

Revulsion.

Skin bruising under forceful hands and mouth; dirty words whispered in my ear and dirty hands running up my thighs.

And I think dirty, filthy, wrong; while my eyes flash hate, hate, hate.

Then he's on top of me and I feel nothing at all.

Numb.

I think about school, and my art assignment that is due on Tuesday, and why he is so rough when he knows I can't fight back any longer, and about how Sean almost kissed me at the party last Saturday night, and IÂ don't recall feeding the cat yet, and how am IÂ going to explain the bruises to everyone again, and I might go to the movies this weekend, and IÂ think of anything and everything other than what he is doing to me; then he stills and it's over.

Tears blurring vision; sloppy kisses on my neck, must never let him kiss me on the mouth.

Satisfied sighs and a broken spirit.

"Such a good little girl." His smile gleams triumphant and his eyes say ˜mine."

Suddenly a loud resounding bang echoes through the dense jungle and I stop, frozen to the spot in fear. An instant later I am running as fast as I can in what I hope is the direction back to the hatch. I slip on the muddy ground and feel the sting of blood running down my leg, and only then do I hear the whispers. I look frantically around for someone or something but all I can see is trees. They creak and sway almost threateningly as the whispers get louder and louder.

I pick myself up off the ground and start running again, branches slicing my face and arms. A flash of colour catches my eye and I stumble, trying to come to a halt. I collide with something warm and soft and reach out to it for support.

It's a person, I realize with shock. I look up into the glassy and unfocused eyes of a young blonde woman. She trembles in my grasp and it takes a moment for me to comprehend why.

She's been shot. Blood runs out of a gaping wound in her stomach, staining her pink top a deep red and making red streams all the way down her legs. I look at my hands and notice they too are stained red.

I scream in terror and let her go as if she had burnt me; falling backwards and hitting my head on something hard. She staggers through the trees out of my sight, leaving me alone in the jungle floor dirty and trembling and completely stunned.

"Shannon!" someone nearby yells and it's the last thing I remember before it all fades to black.

**A/N**: ok so that was it! Hope it was worth the wait. I have no idea where the Desmond thing is going now that he is a rregular in the cast. Oh well, review please! And check out 'Problem Customer'. BOONE IS IN IT! I mean...umm...


	23. Sorry!

Hi everyone, sorry i haven't updated in like...2 months! I have about 300 words of the next chapter done, which is-even to my standards-very very bad. Life just has a way of getting in the way of things i suppose. I work 42 Hours a week and when i come home i'm pretty tired and the last thing i want to do is sit infront of the computer when i've been doing it all day. Also i have a few things i need to finish, like drawings for people that were due hmmm...a month ago!

Also, i've been downloading season 3 on utube. So many things about my story dont go with how the show is going now and I wanted to keep it close to the show and now its pretty much impossible with what i've created, so i need time to rethink my plot and get more inspiration.

So this is just to say thanks for reading and to let you all know I probably won't be updating til my week off during the xmas holidays, perhaps even later.

Hopefully santa brings me lots of wonderful plot bunnies!

So happy thanksgiving (even though i have no idea when in november it is) and Merry Christmas and thanks again for reading!

Morgan.


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